Fwd:NCFMR News and Notes

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: National Center for Family & Marriage Research <ncfmr@bgsu.edu>
Date: Mon, Apr 30, 2012 at 10:25 AM
Subject: News and Notes
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


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News and Notes

April 2012 

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Welcome

The National Center for Family & Marriage Research (NCFMR), established in 2007 at Bowling Green State University (BGSU), welcomes you to News and Notes, our monthly electronic newsletter. News and Notes aims to keep you informed about the activities of the NCFMR. We will also announce funding and research opportunities, provide registration details for conferences and workshops, and keep you updated on current research findings.

 

 

Conference and Poster Session Registration Remain Open for the...
Fathers & Fathering in
Contemporary Contexts
2012 Research Conference

The goal of this conference is to move forward our understanding of fathers and fathering in contemporary contexts and examine their linkages to well-being. The panel of interdisciplinary researchers will discuss cutting-edge topics on fatherhood and fathering by sharing new theoretical, empirical, methodological, and measurement insights. Link to Conference Agenda and Webpage.

Register Now!

Limited Conference Seating Remains Available
  • Please email your name, title, and affiliation to ncfmr@bgsu.edu. After registering, you will receive a confirmation email with further details.

Enter Your Research Poster!
Limited Small Poster Session Space Available
  • The second day of the Fathers & Fathering conference will include a poster session featuring a novel format of small posters (40 x 30 inches) on issues related to the theme of the conference, Fathers & Fathering. After registering, you will receive a confirmation email with further details.
 
 
 
Cohabiting Men are Most Likely to be Nonresident Fathers

One in five currently cohabiting men (20%) has a minor, nonresident child. Married and single men are only about half as likely to have a nonresident child. About 12% of married men and 10% of single men (not living in a co-residential union) have a nonresident child. The NCFMR research team explores the prevalence of nonresident fatherhood across other key characteristics such as race/ethnicity and educational attainment in its new family profile titled "Who are Nonresident Fathers? Demographic Characteristics of Nonresident Fathers."

Percentage of Men (15-44) with a Nonresident Child by Current Relationship Status
Nonresident Fathers Bar Chart
Source: NSFG 2006-2010 Male Data File.
 

 

 
What's New at the NCFMR...
 

Family Profiles

Original reports summarizing and analyzing nationally representative data with the goal to provide the latest analysis of U.S. families.


The Data Source

Documents describing newly released data sets used by the family research community.


NCFMR in the News
For a full list of NCFMR in the News items and for media links to each item, visit the NCFMR in the News webpage. 

  • NCFMR Co-Director Susan Brown's Research Addresses New National Trend: "The Gray Divorce Revolution"
  • Wendy Manning, NCFMR Co-Director, Comments on the "Cohabitation Effect"
  • Susan Brown, NCFMR Co-Director, and I-Fen Lin, NCFMR Research Affiliate, Find More Boomers are Choosing to Go it Alone
  • NCFMR External Grantee Michal Grinstein-Weiss and Colleagues' Research Finds Homeownership May Provide Social Benefits
  • BGSU/NCFMR Research Affiliate Karen Benjamin Guzzo Discusses Cohabitation and Children
  • Research Led by BGSU Psychologist and NCFMR Research Affiliate Kenneth Pargament Addresses Mysticism
  • Wendy Manning and Susan Brown, NCFMR Co-Directors, Find Family Life in America is in Flux
  • NCFMR Research Affiliate Peggy Giordano and Her Colleagues' Research Finds Teenage Boys as Emotionally Invested in Their Romantic Relationships as Girls
NCFMR in the News

 

 
 
 

Susan Brown Receives Olscamp Research Award
(L-R) Gary Lee, BGSU Sociology Professor; Susan Brown, NCFMR Co-Director; and Michael Ogawa, VP Research & Economic Development
    

Congratulations to NCFMR Co-Director and BGSU Sociology Professor Susan Brown who was recently awarded with the prestigious Olscamp Research Award. Achievements and contributions of Bowling Green State University faculty are recognized at an annual reception hosted by the Office of the Provost on the BGSU campus.
 
 
 
US Map
U.S. Census Bureau Releases 2010 Census Briefs

The U.S. Census Bureau released a 2010 Census brief April 26. Households and Families: 2010 shows interracial and interethnic opposite-sex married couple households grew by 28% over the decade. Visit the Census Bureau website for details.
 

Upcoming Events 

 

 

May 2012

 

ICPSR Summer Program 

Quantitative Methods of Social Research  

Variety of workshop dates available 

Contact the ICPSR Summer Program for Details 

 

Call for Applications -- NIJ PhD Graduate Research Fellowship Program

Date Due: May 2

Link to U.S. Department of Justice 

 

Call for Applications -- W.E.B. Du Bois Fellowship for Research in Race, Gender, Culture, and Crime

Date Due: May 2

Link to U.S. Department of Justice 

 

New Integrated Fertility Survey Series (IFSS) Data Set Introductory Workshop

To be held at the PAA 2012 Annual Meeting (see PAA below)  

Date: May 2

Link to Population Studies Center (PSC) IFSS Brochure 

 

Population Association of America (PAA) 2012 Annual Meeting

Dates: May 3-5

Link to PAA 

 

Minnesota Gerontological Association Webinar

Nursing Homes and Health

Date: May 8

Link to NCFR Webinar Flyer 

 

Northwest Council on Family Relations Spring Conference

For Better AND Worse: The Revolution in Family Life

Date: May 18

Link to NWCFR 

 

2012 NCFMR Annual Research Conference

Fathers and Fathering in Contemporary Contexts

Dates: May 23-24

Link to NCFMR Conference Website 

 

 

15th Annual Welfare Research and Evaluation Conference

Dates: May 30-June 1

Link to Office of Planning, Research & Evaluation, An Office of the Administration for Children & Families (ACF)   

 

 

June 2012

 

The Center for Research on Families (CRF) -- UMass, Amherst 

Summer 2012 Methodology Workshop Series 

Dates: Varied Dates in June

Link to CRF  

 

Alliance for Children and Families Workshop

Serving Those Who Serve: Providing Military Cultural Competent Services

Dates: June 4-5

Link to Alliance for Children and Families  

 

Work and Family Researchers Network Conference (WFRN) 
Dates: June 14-16

NCFR Report Seeks Family Studies Articles
Open Mic
Date Due: June 21

July 2012

 

International Association for Relationship Research Conference (IARR) 

Dates: July 12-16

Link to IARR 

 

ICPSR Summer Courses on Data Science -- Michigan State University  

Link to Michigan State University 

  • Dyadic Data Analysis Workshop
    Dates: July 23-27
  • Assessing and Mitigating Disclosure Risk: Essentials for Social Science
    Dates: July 30-August 3
  • Providing Social Science Data Services: Strategies for Design and Operation
    Dates: August 6-10 

Add Health 2012 Users Conference

Dates: July 26-27

Link to CPC UNC Add Health  

 

Data Training and Users Workshop for the Longitudinal Study of Generations

Dates: July 26-27

Link to ICPSR 

 

 

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Generosity in Relationships

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Carolyn Rich Curtis <info@skills4us.org>
Date: Fri, Apr 27, 2012 at 11:37 AM
Subject: Generosity in Relationships
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


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How generous are you in your relationship?
From www.livesimplylove.com:

Are you generous with your spouse or do you find yourself withholding instead of giving? We are often generous with the people we care about, like our family, friends and neighbors. We are generous with those in need. But how generous are we with our spouse? 

 

Are you generous...

...with your time-both time together and time apart?
...with your forgiveness-are you quick to forgive?
...in listening when your spouse needs to talk-really listening rather than trying to solve?
...in your physical relationship-do you "give" more than you "receive" and if so, do you give with a joyful heart?
...with your vulnerability and honesty-are you sharing deeply from the heart?
...with your possessions-are your belongings "mine" or "ours"?

 

What other ways can we be generous with our spouse? If you have ideas, please share them on our facebook page.

Like us on Facebook   Follow us on Twitter
Relationship Skills Center
9719 Lincoln Village Drive, Suite 503
Sacramento, California 95827
916-362-1900
www.skills4us.org
This email was sent to billcoffin68@gmail.com by info@skills4us.org |  
Relationship Skills Center | 9719 Lincoln Village Dr. | Suite 503 | Sacramento | CA | 95827

Live Simply Love Serving

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Live Simply Love <support@livesimplylove.com>
Date: Sat, Apr 21, 2012 at 2:29 PM
Subject: Live Simply Love Serving
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


 



Serving

Posted: 21 Apr 2012 09:28 AM PDT

 

The letter “S” provided several options for today’s A to Z Challenge post: sharing, selflessness, sacrifice, support…but I decided to go with Serving, because it encompasses a little of all of those things.

&copy; Mark Aplet Fotolia.com 197402 XS 300x200 Serving“What do you do to serve him?” a friend asked me a few years ago when I was dating a new boyfriend. “Um. What do you mean?” I really had no clue. Should I be making him cookies once a week?

She explained her thoughts about relationships {especially marriage} being about “out-serving” each other. I’d always done nice things for boyfriends like making sentimental gifts, cooking and for some, I even did laundry. But now that I think about it, I probably did those things for ME rather than to serve him. {I mean, what guy really wants a homemade frame decorated with red and pink hearts!}

You see, my focus was all about me and my happiness. That’s how I gauged if a relationship was successful.

Now that I’m married, I think I understand a little better what my friend was trying to communicate. She was focused on the concept of being his “helpmate,” which makes a whole lot more sense to me in marriage than it does in dating. It’s not always about doing a bunch of stuff for him. Even though sometimes that’s what it looks like: cooking, laundry, cleaning {kind of} – but those are daily tasks we try to share so that one person doesn’t always carry the whole load.

Really, what serving looks like today involves asking the question, Am I putting him first? Or am I more concerned about my needs? Do I notice his weariness at the end of the day, when all I want to do is tell him how my day went? Am I aware of his love-language-need for physical touch, and am I responding in a loving, welcoming way? Have we recently had “shoulder-to-shoulder” time engaged in an activity he enjoys? What am I doing to encourage him and affirm all the ways he serves and cares for me?

Serving is not about balance, doing your equal share or even fairness…because that perspective is still self-focused. I think my friend was right. It’s about both of us doing whatever we can every day to care for the other.

How are you serving your spouse?

Photo credit: © Mark Aplet – Fotolia.com


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Adulterers Advise How To Protect Your Marriage - Ethics & Religion Col. 1,599

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Michael J. McManus <mike@marriagesavers.org>
Date: Wed, Apr 18, 2012 at 9:19 PM

April 18, 2012

Column #1,599

Adulterers Advise How To Protect Your Marriage

By Mike McManus

 

            ORLANDO -The Secret Service sex scandal is the tip of America’s adultery iceberg.  Studies report that infidelity is on the rise, particularly among older men and women and young couples. 

 

            Good news!  Adulterers have advice on how you can protect your marriage!

 

            First, the data.  According to a National Science Foundation survey at the University of Chicago, in any given year about 12 percent of men and 7 percent of women say they had sex outside marriage.  That’s no epidemic.

 

            However, the lifetime rate of infidelity for men over 60 has increased from 20 percent in 1991 to 28 percent in 2006.  For women over 60, adultery has tripled from 5 percent in 1991 to 15 percent over a lifetime.

           

It’s also growing among new marriages.  One-fifth of men and 15 percent of women under35 say they have ever been unfaithful, up from about 15 and 12 percent.

 

            At the American Association of Christian Counselors meeting in Orlando, David Carder spoke about “Close Calls: What Adulterers Want You To Know About Protecting Your Marriage.”

 

            First, the culture has become more permissive.  For example, a generation of divorce has spawned “children of divorce,” who are particularly vulnerable.  Half of adulterers suffered through a parental divorce. 

 

            Secondly, nowadays marriage is postponed so long that by the time people marry, they have had several serious relationships.  If their spouse does not turn out to be their dreamed SOUL MATE, people remember that former friend as a person to “talk to.” If they meet, and have a drink or two together, the adultery temptation becomes very real very quickly.

 

            Two-thirds of men and 51 percent of women would have an affair with an old flame if they don’t think they will get caught!

 

            Add to that the Internet, where people say things they’d never say in person. In fact, eHarmony claims credit for 5 percent of all weddings, about 100,000 a year!

 

            “Is it possible to be innocently prepared for adultery?” asked Carder.  “Yes!”

 

Stress increases the likelihood of infidelity.  He cited a study to prove it.  Researchers asked men to walk over a bridge, and then describe an average-looking coed at the end of the bridge.  A month later, they were asked to walk over the same bridge, and describe the same girl.  But this time, the bridge shook, and appeared unstable.

 

Now their descriptions of the same co-ed reported her more attractive, even beautiful.

 

“When you go through elevated periods of stress or anxiety, the first person looks better than they are,” Carder asserted. “They appear to be the answer to your dilemma.”

 

Another study of pastors who committed adultery found that 90 percent felt bushwhacked or surprised and never saw it coming. “Very quick chemistry can shock you with its power, an infatuation explosion,” which can ruin a career for absolutely nothing.

 

Be forewarned and forearmed!

 

Here’s another danger adulterers want to warn you about: platonic relationships. A man and woman might share an interest or a passion at work or in volunteering. Half of adulteries begin with an innocent friendship with a person of the opposite sex.  You enjoy the same music or serving the poor.

 

Or your might face a “dangerous partner profile.”  You meet someone and think, “I will have an affair with this guy,” as soon as he walked in.  It is not the wild person who instantly attracts you.

 

Adulterers want to warn you about other tempting dangers:

 

You find yourself saving topics of conversation for that colleague at work, rather than your spouse. You feed the friendship, but not with evil intentions.

 

Your friend asks you, “How can I get my husband to listen to me?”

 

You try to show you have a caring heart and try to be helpful.

 

You find yourself comparing your spouse to that friend, thinking, “If he respected me like Bill does.”  You know he is not trying to seduce you, but are seduced!

 

You find yourself thinking, “How lucky he is to be married to her.  He has such a great wife.”

 

You find yourself spending more alone time with a friend than with a spouse and rationalize, “We are serving Jesus.”

 

She listens to you, without flirting with you. That makes you want to spend more time with the friend.  But you tell her, “When you see me at church with my wife, don’t smile at me.”

 

Adultery has many pleasant faces.

 

Beware…

Copyright © Michael J. McManus is President of Marriage Savers and a syndicated columnist.

 

 

 

My new email address is mike@marriagesavers.org

Michael J. McManus
syndicated columnist
"Ethics & Religion"
President & Co-Chair
Marriage Savers
9311 Harrington Dr.
Potomac, MD 20854
www.marriagesavers.org
301-469-5873

 

 

Untitled

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Data released by Healthy Relationships California (HRC) from the largest study ever conducted on the impact of Marriage Education classes showed that these programs help couples significantly improve their communication and levels of relationship satisfaction. Surveying 17,245 Californians who took one of several programs available for couples, HRC found a statewide average increase of more than 13% in relationship satisfaction immediately after taking a Marriage Education course, and that this improvement increased to 16% after [...] Read more »

Live Simply Love Preferences

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Live Simply Love <support@livesimplylove.com>
Date: Wed, Apr 18, 2012 at 2:41 PM
Subject: Live Simply Love Preferences
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


 



Preferences

Posted: 18 Apr 2012 05:38 AM PDT

 

In my 20s there was this simple list of things I heard people talk about related to marital compatibility–and it seemed they all were about personal preferences. Whether or not you put the cap back on the toothpaste {yes, you should}, which way the toilet paper should go {over, of course} and which side of the bed you sleep on {if lying down, I’m on the left}.

&copy; Adambooth freeimage 1391091 200x300 PreferencesIt may have been these kinds of topics that made me think living with my boyfriend would help me determine if we’d be compatible for marriage. I mean if we could work those things out, what COULDN’T we do? Right? But with two different boyfriends, two living-togethers {yes, at two different times}, neither relationship resulted in marriage. And it had NOTHING to do with how well we managed toilet paper or toothpaste.

I’m oh-so-much-the-wiser now. Playing marriage didn’t help me understand what it meant to be married. It took BEING married to help me with that. And I learned it’s about so much more than compatible preferences.

Still, we’ve both definitely got our preferences. I’m slow to throw things away; he’s quick. I like to let the hand-washed dishes dry on the counter; he likes to grab a towel and dry them immediately. I don’t mind clutter; it drives him crazy. He could eat the same thing for lunch every day for a week; I like a little more variety. I make emotional decisions; he makes practical ones. He prefers a firm bed; the squishier the better for me.

Despite our different preferences, we’ve got a pretty good marriage. Some of this stuff drives us crazy about each other, but that’s where learning to be patient and forgive often has made all the difference.

What preference differences & similarities do you notice in your marriage? 

Photo Credit: © Adambooth | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos


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