Fwd: Communication & Agreeing to Disagree!👊

We at First Things First are sharing some tips to help you communicate better!

January 14, 2022

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💪 You can create a stronger marriage with these 10 tips.

⁉️ Get some insight & understanding of your communication style with this quiz.

😞 If your spouse has become a bit boring, here's what you can do.

👥 Ask yourself these questions before sharing your marital problems with others.

👊 It's totally healthy to agree to disagree with your spouse sometimes.

tips & tricks for growth

create some comfort in your life

It’s not normal to experience the amount of stress, anxiety, and uncertainty most of us have felt the past two years. And it’s been challenging for many to find any relief or comfort, yet we desperately need it.


Many folks are great at creating comforting moments for others, but when it comes to being intentional about creating comfort in their world, well, not so much. We all need moments that allow for a break in the action to hit the refresh button. It’s good for us, and it’s good for the people around us.


Ways to create some comfort in your life: 

  1. Make a list of all the things you love that make you happy.
    Do some of those things daily.
  2. Indulge in your favorite comfort meal.
    You know, all the stuff you would typically say, “I shouldn’t be eating this…” Eat that and savor every second of it guilt-free.
  3. Take time out for a walk.
    Make a point of looking up at the sky, watching the trees, and looking for wildlife. Pay attention to your breathing. Avoid thinking about things that are stressful in your life at the moment. Literally, take a break.
  4. Laugh.
    Watch a funny show or talk to that friend who always makes you laugh.
  5. Listen to soothing music, read a book or magazine, work on a puzzle, or on your hobby.
    Doing something that distracts you from the day’s stress and anxiety can be relaxing and bring comfort.

foster effective communication in your marriage

What are the keys to effective communication? Well, research on what makes marriage work shows that happy and healthy couples have a ratio of 5:1 positive to negative behaviors in their relationship.


This means there are five times as many positive interactions between happy couples (i.e., listening, validating the other person, using soft words, expressing appreciation, affirmation, physical affection, compliments, etc.) as there are negative (i.e., raising one’s voice, stating a complaint, or expressing one’s anger).


Tips for improving the effectiveness of communication in your relationship:


🗣️ Be intentional about spending time together.


🗣️ Use more “I” statements and less “You” statements.


🗣️ Be specific.


🗣️ Avoid mind-reading.


🗣️ Express negative feelings constructively.


🗣️ Listen without being defensive.


🗣️ Freely express positive feelings.


This week's picks come from Lauren Hall, wife of 7 years to Daniel, toddler momma, dog momma, and the CEO here at First Things First. Take a peek at her recommendations for this week because they are just THAT GOODCheck 'em out 👀:


🎧 The Naked Marriage Podcast- Full transparency, my husband and I listen to this podcast on the regular. Sex is one of their number one topics, as well as intimacy, conflict and communication. Tactile, easy-to-use information in a fun deliverable.


💻 Marripedia- This is Wikipedia… for Marriage. Which means, YES, it’s just as fishy and just as fascinating. Some items on this site are for giggles, but others are completely fascinating and eye-opening. My husband and I often peruse the links and share what we find beneficial and/or just plain sad. 


📖 Read: Fighting Words by Ellie Holcomb- This is 100% faith-based. Daily scripture, prayers and meditation at its best. I include this in my “marriage” section because it’s led me on a deeper journey in my faith which leads me to a deeper connection with my spouse. I suggest this for Christians especially, but all can benefit from the hope it provides. 


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