Fwd: [iNudgeYou]: US nudge unit?

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Pelle Guldborg Hansen <pgh@ruc.dk>
Date: Mon, Aug 5, 2013 at 4:55 AM
Subject: [iNudgeYou]: US nudge unit?
To: Pelle Guldborg Hansen <pgh@ruc.dk>


Dear Reader,

It's MONDAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! And we hope that you're in a good mood:)

Last week we monitored the US debate in the wake of Fox News coverage on the White House plans for a US Nudge Unit. 

You can quickly get an overview by reading our interesting post here:


Good reading and have a nice day:)

Pelle and the rest of the iNudgeyou-team


Best regards,

Pelle Guldborg Hansen | Behavioral Scientists, Ph.d. | Dept. of Communication, Business & Information Technologies | Roskilde University | Director | ISSP - The Initiative for Science, Society & Policy | University of Southern Denmark & Roskilde University | Chairman of the Danish Nudging Network | Member of the Prevention Council, Danish Diabetes Association |  pgh@ruc.dk | Skype: Peguha | Cell: +45 2789 8789 | Blog: www.inudgeyou.com

Invitation to Class and training for Marriage and Relationships Class- [version en Español]

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Edixon Martinez <edixon@relationshipsca.org>
Date: Thu, Mar 7, 2013 at 5:44 PM
Subject: Invitation to Class and training for Marriage and Relationships Class- [version en Español]
To:
Cc: jaasscencio@newyorklife.com, roman.udiaz@yahoo.com, pjguzman7@yahoo.com, smile4ever.lara@gmail.com, luckymuloccan@aol.com, agustinpenal@aol.com, medranonotary@alo.com, virginiaojeda328@yahoo.com, manzoelsa@yahoo.com, saritaleon08@yahoo.com, ebelofc@yahoo.com, gabym.1989@hotmail.com, biztam@yahoo.com, cesaraltamirano58@yahoo.com, avargas@bcoe.org, carlk@stclareroseville.org, besttechno1@yahoo.com, marinko@surewest.net, Artec@comcast.net, Bento Leal <bento@relationshipsca.org>, Bill Coffin <bill@relationshipsca.org>, Lorrie Gramer <lorriegramer@aol.com>, Steve Patton <spatton@diocese-sacramento.org>


Ver version en Español

What % of couples in your parish/diocese have all 3 of the essentials of a couples' primary coping system?

 

  •     Commitment to ongoing growth and change
  •     Good communication skills
  •     Ability to deal creatively with inevitable conflict and anger in marriage

 

The average response was that only 27% of couples had all three of the essentials  


by: Bill Coffin

 

 

We will be conducting a two day class training for people that are interested in pursuing and becoming facilitators in the Sacramento County and other areas:  http://www.relationshipsca.org/classes/find-a-class/details/820, We want to be able to offer deacons this training in March. This is a pre-requisite class to take the WCM-TTF in April to become an instructor for participants: http://www.relationshipsca.org/classes/find-a-class/details/857.  

 

Also we are asking for volunteers who might help in their parish or diocese with these classes. We can offer books, materials and other benefits to your parish or diocese free of charge when you become a facilitator for HRS or HRC.

 

Please call me or e-mail for questions or registrations.

 

Edixon-


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Español

¿Qué porcentaje de las parejas en su parroquia o diócesis tiene estos 3 sistemas esenciales de confrontación?

 

  •     Compromiso de crecimiento continuo y cambio
  •     Buenas habilidades de comunicación
  •     Habilidad de tratar creativamente con conflictos inevitables y de agresión en el matrimonio

 

La respuesta promedio fue de sólo el 27% de las parejas tenia los 3 esenciales   

 

Estaremos conduciendo un entrenamiento de dos días para personas interesadas en convertirse en facilitadores en Sacramento, CA: http://www.relationshipsca.org/classes/find-a-class/details/820, Queremos ofrecer a los diáconos este entrenamiento en Marzo. Este será un pre-requisito antes de tomar el WCM-TTF en Abril para ser facilitador de participantes: http://www.relationshipsca.org/classes/find-a-class/details/857.  

 

Además estamos buscando por voluntarios quienes quieran ayudar en sus parroquias y diócesis con estas clases. Podemos ofrecer libros, materiales y otros beneficios a parroquias y diócesis completamente gratis cuando se convierte en facilitador de HRS o HRC.

 

Por favor llame o escriba e-mail con preguntas o pre-registración de la clase.

 

Edixon-

 

 

Maybe I do Update - Thursday, 28 February 2013

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Maybe I do <noreply@maybeido.com>
Date: Thu, Feb 28, 2013 at 11:30 AM
Subject: Maybe I do Update - Thursday, 28 February 2013
To: Bill Coffin <billcoffin68@gmail.com>


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Thursday, 28 February 2013

Dear Bill,

Please find this week's posts on maybeido.com below.

Irish families

Who is likely to have a big family and what does it mean for the children growing up in them? Read More

Saying 'I love you'

Being in a relationship means having to play the role of supporter to your partner. It means showing them you’re there, that you’re on their side and that you always have time for them; it also means giving them a sense of security and love that makes them feel important and safe. Read More

How to stay together

Couples who want a happy marriage should do their homework. Read More

The honeymoon is over

Couples start taking each other for granted three years and six months into their marriage, a new UK poll reveals. Read More

Enduring love

As audiences chuckle at films such as new romantic comedy "I Give It A Year," researchers at The Open University have been looking at what keeps couples together after the flurry of Valentine's Day romance is over. Read More

Regrets - I've had a few

Dating disasters, awkward sex and the struggle to get a dream career off the ground are all experienced by the 20-somethings in hit TV show Girls. Read More

Lovers' hearts

When modern-day crooner Trey Songz sings, "Cause girl, my heart beats for you," in his romantic ballad, Flatline, his lyrics could be telling a tale that's as much physiological as it is emotional, according to a University of California, Davis, study that found lovers' hearts indeed beat for each other, or at least at the same rate. Read More

Chivalry

Sir Lancelot was prepared to risk his honour as a knight, death at the hands of the villain Maleagant, and even the wrath of his king to win the love of Queen Guinevere.

And it seems modern men are little different from the knights of Arthurian legend.

A new study reveals that men are willing to take dangerous gambles to get the attention of the opposite sex, and the romantic tendency is apparently firmly rooted in evolution.

One version of the Lancelot legend has the gallant knight falling in love after catching only the briefest glance of King Arthur's wife Guinevere.

After she is kidnapped by the evil knight Maleagant, Lancelot is willing to jeopardise his honour as a knight by riding in a cart reserved for criminals, then face death in a duel to rescue her.

Finally, after further trials, he risks the jealous rage of King Arthur himself by becoming Guinevere's adulterous lover.

And it's not just Lancelot: from Romeo to Robin Hood, myths and fiction are are littered with men willing to face potentially deadly trials in the name of romance.

But taking risks to impress women has a strong foundation in real life, where the willingness to face dangers for the fairer sex has been commonplace since the dawn of man.

A recent study from the Journal of Risk Research finds risk-taking behaviour has in part been evolved to enhance an individual's ability to attract a mate.

According to the study: 'In the evolutionary past, our ancestors were faced with a hazardous environment where they were forced to take greater risks in order to find shelter, food and sexual partners.

'Thus, individuals who played it safe in that they did not take any risks at all, were unlikely to survive.'

So, it appears, men have inherited this willingness to face dangers for women from our risk-friendly ancestors.

But in a modern age where these primeval problems are all but extinct, men are looking for other risks to boast their willingness to face danger.

The study looks at three examples of risk taking behaviour in men and women: sexual risk taking (like unprotected sex), gambling and reckless driving.

In all three tests, men were more likely to take the inherent risks involved once a romantic element has been induced.

Women however showed no more desire to take unnecessary risks.

Of course, the authors note, while these activities may have perceived short term benefits, their long-term effects are potentially devastating.

That's something wannabe white knights may want to consider in the run-up to Valentine's Day.

Source: Damien Gayle, Daily Mail, February 12, 2013

Read More

Yours sincerely,

Kevin Andrews
 

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Sender: Kevin Andrews, Level 1, 651 Doncaster Road DONCASTER VIC 3108 AUSTRALIA.
 

How the Brain Falls in Love

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Greater Good Science Center <jhmarsh@berkeley.edu>
Date: Wed, Feb 13, 2013 at 11:05 AM
Subject: How the Brain Falls in Love
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


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February 2013

Greetings!
 
Autumn Lovers
Valentine's Day will soon come and go, but love is more than just a fleeting emotion, says positive psychologist Barbara Fredrickson--it's a physical process that changes us right down to our cells.

In "Five Ways to Renew an Old Love," Fredrickson, the author of the new book Love 2.0, explains how this insight can help keep love alive in long-term couples. 

This week we offer several other science-based takes on love--ways to understand it more deeply, and nurture more of it in your own life:

"How Love Grows in Your Body": Jeremy Adam Smith traces love's path through our brains and bloodstream, from the wild passion of the hypothalamus to the mature compassion regulated by the vagus nerve. 

"Gratitude is for Lovers": Psychologist Amie M. Gordon reveals new research showing that thankfulness, not romance, might be key to a happy Valentine's Day. In a separate article, she turns that research into four tips for maximizing gratitude on Valentine's Day.
 
Video: Say (or Think) Thanks: In this short video, Christine Carter explains how just thinking grateful thoughts can be good for your love life.

"Love in the Classroom": Of course, there's more to love than romance, especially in schools. Vicki Zakrzewski asked readers to share their stories of love in education. The moving responses went well beyond candy hearts and raging hormones.
 
Just One Thing: Trust in Love: Rick Hanson explains that love can be hard to see, but it's in you and all around you. 
 
Compassionate Love Quiz: You might love truly, madly, and deeply. But do you love compassionately? Take our quiz to find out.
Upcoming Events: See Jon Kabat-Zinn, Kristin Neff, and others at the Greater Good Conference

Practicing Mindfulness & Compassion

When: March 8, 2013

Where: Craneway Conference Center, Richmond, CA 

*Will be Webcast Live!*

 

The GGSC, in partnership with Mindful, is pleased to present this ground-breaking, one-day conference, which will explore the important connections between mindfulness and compassion.

 

Speakers, including Jon Kabat-Zinn (keynote), will discuss how to apply scientific findings to the real world, focusing on how mindfulness can deepen relationships, enhance caregiving, and build compassion for yourself and others. Other speakers include Kristin Neff, Shauna Shapiro, Paul Gilbert, and Dacher Keltner.

 

Attendees will practice research-tested mindfulness and compassion techniques and learn from program leaders in education, health care, and beyond. CEUs available.

Make every day Valentine's Day- Tips from Relationship Skills Center

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Carolyn Rich Curtis <info@skills4us.org>
Date: Tue, Feb 12, 2013 at 12:03 PM
Subject: Make every day Valentine's Day- Tips from Relationship Skills Center
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com
Valentine's Day is a one date event.  Showing your partner that you care is on-going.  Here are some small ideas from Diane Gottsman that will make your love soar.  - Carolyn
  1. Hold hands: locked hands, fingers intertwined, while sitting across the table or walking side by side.   
  2. Look her in the eyes and gently kiss her on the forehead: a simple sign of subtle passion, adoration or simple affection. 
  3. Smile when he walks through the door: rather than asking, "Do you know what time it is?" or, "Did you pick up the dry cleaning", try a smile and a six second hug instead.
  4. Pour her a glass of wine and don't let her in the kitchen until dinner is served: Come home early and surprise your wife with her favorite meal.   
  5. Pay attention to special holidays and anniversaries: don't assume he won't want a present or special card. Just because he always says, "I don't need anything" doesn't mean he doesn't deserve a sweet present from the one he loves.  
  6. Sit next to her, without complaining, while she watches her favorite show: okay, you can read or play "Words with Friends," but the fact that you are next to her is a significant plus.   
  7. Make a concerted effort to really listen: Nod and respond when she tells you about her day and the idiosyncrasies of her office mates whom you don't know. Ask questions and stay alert.   
  8. Leave a love note on his car: make sure and sign your name!  
  9. Bring her coffee (or juice) without being asked: every morning, forever, always and not just once. 
  10. Sit with her in the emergency room when your son has an allergy attack: this is different than saying, "Do you want to go, or do you want me to go?" Do it together and share the pain.   
  11. Paint her toes: you'll make a mess, but so what? A real man will do some pretty frilly stuff to show his wife that he loves her!   
  12. Surprise her by filling her tank with gas and get her car washed without her knowledge.
  13. Offer her a back rub without "benefits:" remember that this time it's about her, not you!   
  14. Warm the car up on a chilly day and have a "to go" cup with his favorite hot beverage waiting: buy him a special travel mug especially for the morning commute.  
  15. Get the kids ready for school and cook or take them to breakfast so she can sleep in: bring back her favorite breakfast food.   
  16. Have a tailgate party in the middle of your living room: serve his favorite foods and plan it around his favorite sporting event. Sit with him and laugh while he yells and curses at the television.   

Share these tips with your network and let us know what you think!

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This email was sent to billcoffin68@gmail.com by info@skills4us.org |  
Relationship Skills Center | 9719 Lincoln Village Dr. | Suite 503 | Sacramento | CA | 95827

5 Ways to Pump Up Your Resiliency

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Carolyn Rich Curtis <info@skillscenter.org>
Date: Wed, Feb 6, 2013 at 12:02 PM
Subject: 5 Ways to Pump Up Your Resiliency
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com
Wondering how you can become more resilient?  When times get tough, it can be challenging to bounce back.  
 

Rate yourself from 1 to 5 (1 = strongly disagree; 5 = strongly agree):

 

  • I'm usually optimistic. I see difficulties as temporary and expect to overcome them.
  • Feelings of anger, loss and discouragement don't last long.
  • I can tolerate high levels of ambiguity and uncertainty about situations.
  • I adapt quickly to new developments. I'm curious. I ask questions.
  • I'm playful. I find the humor in rough situations, and can laugh at myself.
  • I learn valuable lessons from my experiences and from the experiences of others.
  • I'm good at solving problems. I'm good at making things work well.
  • I'm strong and durable. I hold up well during tough times.
  • I've converted misfortune into good luck and found benefits in bad experiences.

Less than 20: Low Resilience - You may have trouble handling pressure or setbacks, and may feel deeply hurt by any criticism. When things don't go well, you may feel helpless and without hope. Consider seeking some professional counsel or support in developing your resiliency skills. Connect with others who share your developmental goals.

 

20-30: Some Resilience - You have some valuable pro-resiliency skills, but also plenty of room for improvement. Strive to strengthen the characteristics you already have and to cultivate the characteristics you lack. You may also wish to seek some outside coaching or support.

 

30-35: Adequate Resilience - You are a self-motivated learner who recovers well from most challenges. Learning more about resilience, and consciously building your resiliency skills, will empower you to find more joy in life, even in the face of adversity.

 

35-45: Highly Resilient - You bounce back well from life's setbacks and can thrive even under pressure. You could be of service to others who are trying to cope better with adversity.

 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 

No. 1: Pump Up Your Positivity

Resilient people are characterized by an ability to experience both negative and positive emotions even in difficult or painful situations. They mourn losses and endure frustrations, but they also find redeeming potential or value in most challenges.  Resilient people tend to find some silver lining in even the worst of circumstances.

 

 

No 2: Live to Learn

The more you can leverage challenges as opportunities to grow and evolve, the more resilient you are likely to be. "Pain comes to all of us in life," says David Sabine, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Wichita Falls, Texas. "What I see resilient people do is immediately look at the problem and say, 'What's the solution to that? What is this trying to teach me?' Looking at pain as an opportunity to learn and problem-solve - and building the confidence and the habit of moving toward the pain instead of running from it - goes a long way in terms of building resiliency."

 

 

No. 3: Open Your Heart

Being of service to others is a powerful way of stoking resilience. Acts of kindness, and the serotonin boosts that accompany them, have a cumulative effect. "Once you've added these things to your life in a consistent way, the benefits become exponential, so that in times of difficulty you've got this well of resiliency to draw upon," says Sabine.  When adversity strikes, gratitude for the things that are going right in your life helps put tragedy in perspective. 

 

 

No. 4: Take Care of Yourself

Good health - and a regular routine of healthy habits - are foundational to both mental and emotional resilience. Daily habits count: When you're caught up on sleep, eating well and keeping stress levels low, you'll be less fragile and less likely to fall into unhealthy patterns. Mental breaks and relaxation also help keep stress chemicals at bay, reducing the likelihood of feeling, or becoming, overwhelmed and reactive. Two other key self-care factors that help nurture resilience: Spending time outdoors and surrounding yourself with people you enjoy.

 

 

No. 5: Hang on to Humor

Laughing in the face of adversity can be profoundly pain relieving, for both the body and mind.

"Playful humor enhances survival for many reasons," writes resiliency authority Al Siebert in The Survivor Personality (Perigee Books, 2010). For one thing, he notes, "Laughing reduces tension to more moderate levels." 

 

© Copyright 2005 Practical Psychology Press, adapted from Chapter 2 in The Resiliency Advantage (Berrett-Koehler) by Al Siebert, PhD.

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This email was sent to billcoffin68@gmail.com by info@skillscenter.org |  
Relationship Skills Center | 9719 Lincoln Village Dr. | Suite 503 | Sacramento | CA | 95827

National Healthy Marriage Resource Center - February 2013

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: National Healthy Marriage Resource Center <info@healthymarriageinfo.org>
Date: Tue, Feb 5, 2013 at 11:04 AM
Subject: National Healthy Marriage Resource Center - February 2013
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


 

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  News Resource Alerts
 
Educators Research & Policy For The Media

NHMRC Named in GoodTherapy.org’s Top 10 List

One of the top therapist directories on the web, GoodTherapy.org, has named both healthymarriageinfo.org and Twoofus.org to their top 10 list of best resources on the web for 2012 related to marriage and couples counseling to help people better understand and cope with relationship issues. The criteria used to make the selection included: quality and depth of content, presentation, and functionality. Read more.

2013 Hispanic Healthy Marriage Webinar Series

Webinar resources from Andrew Behnke, Ph.D., webinar, Improving the Lives of Latino Families through Effective Practice and Research.

Recursos en Español

New Tip Sheet for Working with First Responders

First responders (an elite group including police officers/fire fighters/paramedics) are often regarded as “heroes” who are passionate about their public service roles, and who provide invaluable and life-saving services to the community. However, along with demanding work schedules, some of the core skills that make first responders successful in their job can also create challenges in maintaining a healthy relationship with partners and family members.

This tip sheet provides valuable tips for practitioners to successfully deliver MRE services to first responders.

Putting Youth Relationship Education on the Child Welfare Agenda: Findings from a Research and Evaluation Review

This document published by Child Trends provides a model of change and reviews the research and evaluation evidence on relationship education for foster care youth. In so doing it discusses the needs of disadvantaged young people around intimate partner relationships; summarizes research on the implications of relationships for child development; identifies common ground and also gaps in the research; and makes recommendations about opportunities to further improve relationship skills among these disadvantaged youth.

The State of our Unions 2012: The President's Marriage Agenda for the Forgotten Sixty Percent

This joint annual publication of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and the Center for Marriage and Families at the Institute for American Values includes the essay, Marriage and Relationship Education: A promising strategy for strengthening low-income, vulnerable families.

By Theodora Ooms, National Healthy Marriage Resource Center, and Alan J. Hawkins, Brigham Young University.

2013 Tax Credit Outreach Community Tool Kit

Your efforts to inform low- and moderate- income working families about the Earned Income Credit (EIC) are vital to ensuring that millions of such families do not miss out on this valuable federal tax credit during these difficult economic conditions. Many low-wage tax filers in 2013 may be eligible for an EIC worth up to $5,891. The boost provided by the EIC and other valuable federal tax credits provide many working families the opportunity to pay their household bills and meet their children’s needs even through salary cutbacks or periods of unemployment. www.eitcoutreach.org.

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