How To Support Black Marriage | ELEV8

Just in time for Black Marriage Day, tomorrow Lamar and Ronnie Tyler the couple behind Happily Ever After and You Saved Me present their new film “Men Ain’t Boys.” The Tyler’s traveled across the country to interview 45 men and multiple experts about the true definition of manhood in the Black community. A resounding theme in the film is how these men (all of whom are married) express their love. Watch as men from ages 22 to 77 explain not just why they love their wives but more importantly how they display their love. The Tylers hope to portray positive examples of Black men on film in a fashion that has never been done before with Men Ain’t Boys. The end desire is to present a blueprint for what real manhood is in our communities and families for not only men but also for our women and children.

With Black marriage numbers at an all time low and Black divorce numbers at an all time high the hopes of positive, lasting, relationships look bleak until now. Executive Producers Lamar and Ronnie Tyler bring real married couples to the screen to chronicle the greatest love stories ever told. These real couples explain how their marriages had a direct impact on their lives. Featuring candid and transparent looks inside of the hardships, trials, and ultimate success stories of these amazing couples. YOU SAVED ME offers an unprecedented look inside of real relationships and what is required to sustain them.

Originally scheduled to air tomorrow in selected areas to tie in with “Black Marriage Day” you can participate by writing to Tyler New Media P.O. Box 284 Grayson, Ga.  30017.

There is a full training program that you can participate by  visiting www.blackmarriageday.com/Black_Marriage_Day/Welcome.html

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Healthy marriages key to employee health

An employer and I have been noticing that many of our employees are missing work and having to take time off to go to court because of marriage problems. I don't want to interfere in people's personal lives but at the same time it is costing the company money when these family problems occur. Do you think I should try to do anything about my employees' marriages?

D.C. Evansville

There are some things you can do as an employer to reach out to employees that need extra help in marriage and family situations. You could begin by displaying literature and brochures in the employee lounge. You could provide an array of information about healthy living, relationships and marriages. There are many nonprofit organizations in the community that would be willing to supply you with information.

Your Human Resources department might be another good point of contact for employees. One benefit you could offer to your employees would be to pay for all or part of the cost to attend a seminar or class pertaining to their situation. This business approach is not a new concept. Many businesses today implement Wellness Programs for employees. A marriage or relationship class could be included in that package.

A divorce hurts the couple and the community financially. The couple will have about a $19,000 loss and the community another $30,000 per divorce. According to Dr. John Curtis, author of "Happily Un-Married," an average employee making $20 per hour would cost the company more than $8,000. One survey, "The effect of marital dissolution on the labor supply of males and females," for the Journal of Socio-Economics (Mueller, 2005) found that employees lost an average of more than 168 hours of work time, equivalent to being fully absent for four weeks in one calendar year. Divorce does cost the company and the employee.

Businesses that work with employees to help strengthen marriages and families can reduce that. Your approach will be the key to the success of this venture. You would not want to single out employees, but offer a new program for all. A healthy marriage for employees will probably translate into a healthier employee for your business.

Research for "The Case for Marriage," by Maggie Gallagher and Linda Waite indicates that healthy marriages contribute to job satisfaction and productivity. An employee in a healthy marriage can concentrate on the job and not be distracted by problems at home.

Community Marriage Builders can help you and your company with workshops to help struggling couples and also be there for marriage preparation and marriage enrichment workshops as well.

John Phillips is executive director of Community Marriage Builders. He can be reached at john@makeitlast.org or (812) 477-2260.

Divorce changing the face of rural American families | | The Bulletin

Divorce changing the face of rural American families

By Sabrina Tavernise and Robert Gebeloff / New York Times News Service
Published: March 25. 2011 4:00AM PST

SIOUX COUNTY, Iowa — In the 1970s, the divorce rate was so low in rural northwest Iowa that it resembled the rest of America in the 1910s. Most of its 28,000 residents were churchgoers, few of its women were in the work force, and divorce was simply not done.

So it is a bitter mark of modernity that even here, divorce has swept in, up nearly sevenfold since 1970, giving Sioux County the unwelcome distinction of being a standout in this category of census data.

Divorce is still less common here than the national average, but its sharp jump illustrates a fundamental change in the patterns of family life.

Forty years ago, divorced people were more concentrated in cities and suburbs. But geographic distinctions have all but vanished, and now, for the first time, rural Americans are just as likely to be divorced as city dwellers, according to an analysis of census data by The New York Times.

“Rural families are going through this incredible transformation,” said Daniel Lichter, a sociology professor at Cornell University.

The shifts that started in cities have spread to less populated regions — women going to work, gaining autonomy and rearranging the order of traditional families. Values have changed, too, easing the stigma of divorce.

“In the bottom ranks, men have lost ground and women have gained,” said June Carbone, a law professor at the University of Missouri-Kansas City and co-author of “Red Families v. Blue Families.”

“A blue-collar guy has less to offer today than he did in 1979,” Carbone added. Those shifting forces, she said, “create a mismatch between expectation and reality” that can result in women becoming frustrated and leaving, because now they can.

Since 1990, class has become an increasingly reliable predictor of family patterns, Carbone said. College-educated Americans are now more likely to get married and stay married than those with only a high school diploma, a change from 20 years ago, she said, when differences were much smaller.

That trend has been particularly important for rural areas, which have fallen further behind urban ones in education, according to census data. Just one in six rural residents has a college degree, far fewer than in cities, where one in three does. Nationally, there were about 121 million married adults and 26 million divorced people in 2009, compared with about 100 million married and 11 million divorced people in 1980. “There’s a perception here that you need to be perfect,” said the Rev. John Lee, a young pastor who has tried to encourage change in Sioux County by taking on taboo topics like divorce and mental illness in his sermons. “When you admit weakness, you invite shame.”

The reason can be traced to Sioux County’s roots. About 80 percent of residents, most of whom are descendants of Dutch immigrants, belong to a major denomination church, compared with 36 percent of all Americans.

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Better Family Life hosts Healthy Marriage Retreat - St. Louis American: Living It

Better Family Life hosts Healthy Marriage Retreat - St. Louis American: Living It
Source: stlamerican.com

Ten years ago, African Americans had the lowest marriage rate of any racial group in the United States. According to the 2000 U.S. Census, 43.3 percent of black men and 41.9 percent of black women in America have never been married. Over the past 30 years the overall marriage rate in the United States declined by 17 percent, but for African Americans, it fell by 34 percent.
 
billcoffin68@gmail.com sent this using ShareThis.

Love Is Here Live - online event

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Andrea Lee <andrea@marriagecomission.com>
Date: Wed, Mar 23, 2011 at 1:36 PM
Subject: Love Is Here Live - online event
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


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Love Is Here Live Event on April 5: Marriage and Family Track at Orlando 2011!

  

Dear CoMission Family,

 

               

Make plans to tune in to our first Love Is Here Live Event on Tuesday, April 5th from 1:00-4:30pm (Eastern)
!

 

                Our purpose for the Marriage and Family Track at the Lausanne Congress and Mission America Coalition Leadership Consultation is to expose church leaders and pastors to innovative programs, opportunities, and strategies to grow marriage strengthening work in their own church and community.

   

                This will be our first Love Is Here Live event which features a live video feed and the ability to sign in through Facebook and ask questions and join the on-line conversation. 

 

          Tune in to www.loveishere.com/live and share this link with pastors and lay leaders in your network who could use a jolt of inspiration and creative thinking about revving up marriage strengthening work in their world.

 

(Some of you may want to consider hosting this event on your own website through our syndicated Love Is Live widget. If you have a large distribution list and would like to invite your constituents to join this event on your own website please email andrea@loveishere.com.) 

 

                Many thanks to David Ferguson and Tim Popadic and all the amazing leaders (see program below) who agreed to pitch in to make this event happen.

 

                Blessings,

                Jeff Fray

                Chairman, Marriage CoMission Steering Committee

 


 

Program Highlights

1:00pm: Why Marriage & Family Matters

(Jeff Fray, Ph.D., Marriage & Family Foundation & Dr. Linda Malon-Colon, Hampton University)

 

·        

Current State of Marriage and Family in America

·         Will the Church make the difference?

 

1:15pm:  Media Research, "An Exhaustive Look at Content on TV" (Lance Mcalindon, Chief Research Officer, Front Porch Entertainment)

 

·         America's advertisers have discovered only a small percent of shows on TV are suitable content for their target customer: "moms with children"

·         Can the Church leverage "clean TV" to reach their community?  Discover some early adopter strategies

 

1:45pm:  Engaging Men in Strengthening Marriage and Family - (Brian Doyle, Iron Sharpens Iron; Stephen Kendrick, Sherwood Films; and Mitch Temple, Courageous Outreach Team)

 

·         Update on this national initiative to encourage spiritual leadership in the home and how you can get involved in your city

·         Introduction to the Courageous Film and information on how churches can leverage this film to lift up their own marriage and family outreach initiatives.

 

2:20pm: Online Audience Q&A with Stephen Kendrick

2:35pm:   The Love Is Journey - Live interview with Nathan and Brittany Fray

2:50pm:  National Marriage Week, USA (Chuck Stetson and Sheila Weber, National Marriage Week Organizers)

 

·      Why National Marriage Week?  What occurred in 2011?  How can we grow this initiative in 2012?

·      Discussion on how churches can leverage this week to highlight marriage and family priorities for the local church

 

 3:20pm:  The Art of Marriage, A video based marriage enrichment for Local Churches (Bill Eyster, Executive Vice President & COO of Family Life)

 

·          Family Life's new marriage strengthening program puts a dynamic, video-based program into the hands of marriage champions in local congregations.

·         How marriage organizations can re-tool to empower ordinary people to be effective marriage champions in the local church.    

 

3:50pm:  Marriage Ministry as Felt-Needs Evangelism  (Tim Popadic, Marriage Pastor at Christ Fellowship Church; Scott Mawdsley, National Director of Marriage Mentoring Initiative; and Les Parrot  author of "Complete Guide to Marriage Mentoring")

 

·         How a Date Night Initiative can grow a church and impact a community

·         When the public responds: How can the Church rise to the challenge of providing real help?  Can the Church be the hub of the marriage and family strengthening movement in America?   How can we grow the prevalence of marriage and family ministry in the local Church in 2011 and beyond?

If you have any questions or needs, please contact Andrea Lee at
andrea.lee@loveishere.com or 404-775-8808.

Thanks!

Marriage CoMission | 5200 Buffington Road | Atlanta | GA | 30349

Relationship Enhancement

Patterson Outreach offers relationship enhancement classes for young couples and couples looking to strengthen their relationships. Couples are taught skills that will improve communication, increase their ability to solve problems, as well as confront financial issues. Patterson Outreach will use the Love’s Cradle Relationship Enhancement curriculum to provide proven techniques in areas of building strong families.

 

 

 

Objective

Participants will learn to:

o Show understanding towards their partner’s thoughts, feelings and concerns.

o Develop positive and effective expression skills.

o Engage in new ways to discuss pertinent issues.

o Find solutions that are beneficial to both partners.

o Use coaching skills to assist one another in needed making changes.

o Put skills into practice in order to build, strengthen and maintain lasting relationships

 

 

 

Learning Methods

Participants will learn through verbal instruction, live and video demonstrations, practices, as well as being coached. Couples are encouraged to be open to participate in group discussions, give feedback, and share thoughts and feelings on issues of their own choosing.


Patterson Outreach Relationship Enhancement

The Love’s Cradle curriculum is a 6 week program consisting of two, 2 hour classes per week.