Candidates for Friday Five

1. Ask the Historical Society: Busiest marriage year


When Work Disappears: Manufacturing Decline and the Falling Marriage-Market Value of Men

David AutorDavid DornGordon Hanson


4. Mental Health Care for Family Members of Post 9/11 Veterans: Practical Approaches to Addressing the Impact of the Invisible Wounds of War on Families (February 2017)


Now Online: Men Without Work
Dr. Nicholas Eberstadt's lecture is now available on YouTube. He explores why American men are leaving the labor force in greater numbers than ever before and the consequences it will have on the American economy and culture.
Watch Now

7. The Science of Compassion in Marriage

Brad Hoppmann

8. Study Finds Cohabiting Parents Twice as Likely to Split as Married Parents

Rachel Sheffield

9. 55 Questions to Break the Military Marriage Radio Silence


10. Married? Here are 2 traits couples need for a happy spouse and healthier life

Thanks Alysse 

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Fwd: National Marriage Week - Ethics & Religion Col.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Michael McManus <>
Date: Thu, Feb 16, 2017 at 12:42 AM
Subject: National Marriage Week - Ethics & Religion Col. #1,851
To: Bill Coffin <>

Ethics & Religion

A Column by Mike McManus


February 16, 2017

Column #1,851

National Marriage Week

By Mike McManus


            It is National Marriage Week, a good time to assess the health of marriage in America.   “The institution of marriage represents the very foundation of human social order,” writes Dr. James Dobson. “Everything of value sits on that base. Institutions, government, religious fervor and the welfare of children are all dependent on its stability.”


            When Gallup asked couples to grade their marriages, 68% gave it an A and 23%, a B. Only 6% gave it a C and 1% each, a D or F.  By contrast, 64% of cohabiting couples who were preparing for marriage, ranked their relationship in the “low satisfaction group.”


            Nor do unhappy marriages stay that way: 86% of bad marriages become good ones!


            However, divorced men are twice as likely as married men to die from the four big killers: heart disease, stroke, hypertension and cancer.  My wife and I report in our book, Living Together: Myths, Risks & Answers, “Auto accidents and suicide death rates for the divorced are almost four times higher; cirrhosis of the liver and pneumonia death rates are seven times higher; the rate of death from murder is eight times greater.”


            Not surprisingly, therefore, being unmarried chops nearly ten years off a man’s life. Married women will live four years longer, and their children, five years longer.


            “Loneliness is a lethal force with the power to break the human heart,” writes James J. Lynch in A Cry Unheard. A married couple cares for each other. For example, a wife watches their diet and objects if her husband pours a second drink.  But when one of them dies, the will to live is extinguished for many.


            Married couples are far wealthier.  Those who never marry experience a 75% reduction in wealth. Married men earn 10% to 40% more than single men with similar education and job history. Why? Married men have a greater work commitment, lower quit rates, healthier and more stable routines.


            According to The Case For Marriage by Linda J. Waite and Maggie Gallagher, “On the verge of retirement, the typical married couple had accumulated about $410,000 compared to $167,000 for the never-married, $154,000 for the divorced, and under $96,000 for the separated.”


            We write, “Marrying offers balance. Spouses are invested in each other and in the well-being of their joint future. He proposes to buy a new car; she says, `That’s a waste of our money. Let’s remodel the screen porch and turn it into a sunroom.’ Result: the investment increases the value of their home.  The single guy buys the car or vacations in Cancun and by retirement can claim fewer assets.”


            Married people also have more and better sex than singles.  TV shows like Sex and the City give the impression the happiest people are those who jump in bed with someone new every Friday night.  But the National Sex Survey reports 43% of married men had sex at least twice a week – compared to only 26% of single men.


Married people also enjoy their sex more, both physically and emotionally than their unmarried counterparts. Married women are almost twice as likely as divorced and never-married women to have a sex life that (a) exists and (b) is extremely emotionally satisfying.


What about cohabiters? While cohabiting couples have at least as much sex as the married, they don’t seem to enjoy it quite as much. For men, having a wife beats shacking up by a wide margin: 48% of husbands say sex with their wife is extremely satisfying emotionally compared to just 37% of cohabiting men.


Therefore, I have a tough question.  Why were there more marriages in 1970 (2,159,000) than in 2015 (2,077,000)?  The population grew from 203 million to 319 million.  If the same percentage of couples were marrying now, there would be 1.3 million more marriages per year!


First, I blame America’s churches for not making a better case for marriage. Four in ten people attend church weekly – giving clergy huge access. Yet, in my 70+ years of attending church, I can remember only one sermon, a recent one - that held up Christian marriage. 


Second, two-thirds of young couples think they should test the relationship by living together.  There were 8.3 million couples cohabiting in 2015, but only 1.3 million of them married.  The rest mostly break up over time. And women who cohabit are 33% more likely to divorce than those who remained apart till marriage.


Churches should insist that cohabiting couples move apart for months before the wedding – to increase their odds of success.


Sadly, few do so.

Copyright © 2017 Michael J. McManus, President of Marriage Savers and a syndicated columnist. To see past columns, go to  Hit Search for any topic.







Mike McManus is President of Marriage Savers

and a syndicated columnist, writing Ethics & Religion weekly

9311 Harrington Dr.

Potomac, MD 20854




Candidates for Friday Five

2. Dr. Anda's recent (2/1/17) medical grand rounds re: ACE's 

​3. Healthy Child Development through Prevention Science
February 2017 NPSC Brief


4. Accepting our children

5. Couple Growth Plan Exercise

Priscilla Hunt

6. 'Random App of Kindness' helps teach children how to be more empathetic



7. Americans are staying single longer than ever, and it’s changing modern marriage in 3 major ways

8. Purging the marriage penalty

9. 7 health benefits of being in a happy marriage

11.Marriage and Sanctity in the Lives of Late Medieval Married Saints

Thanks Alysee. Enjoy your trip!

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Candidates for Friday Five

1. Call for Papers: European Network for the Sociological and Demographic Study of Divorce

2. About Healthy Marriage & Relationship Education



4. Strange Sex Habits of Silicon Valley


East and West may be reshaping each other's parenting

Dr Xinyin Chen 

6. Fatherhood in the 21st Century: Valentine’s Day Musings and Letters

Dr. Gerald Brown


8. Fatherhood Initiatives: Connecting Fathers to Their Children

Congressional Research Service, Library of Congress. Carmen Solomon-Fears, Jessica Tollestrup. December 28, 2016

9.  IKEA Carpark Therapy

10. Under pressure: the relationships of UK parents who have a child with a learning disability

Dr David Marjoribanks


I'm bored with my relationship



Thanks Alysse

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Fwd: Marriage Week is here. So much happening. TV and more

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---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: National Marriage Week USA <>
Date: Mon, Feb 6, 2017 at 4:58 PM
Subject: Marriage Week is here. So much happening. TV and more

NMW header
National Marriage Week starts tomorrow, Feb. 7th!! 
LOOK what's happening!
It's here!

National Marriage Week USA starts tomorrow, February 7th. It's already heating up!

Many hundreds of activities are already on our National can LOCATE one near you in a search by state. And KEEP POSTING your own events because we will get national news coverage this week.

Here's a "good-to-share" 3-minute national TV clip from EWTN Global News

Salon TV hosted a 20-minute conversation
with NMW executive director Sheila Weber and BoldGlobal founder Carrie Sheffield. Watch this good resource for answers to probing questions among millennials and marriage today.

An example of LOCAL Media Coverage potential: The Cleveland Daily Banner article, "Campaign Designed to Encourage Marriage and Reduce Divorce"
The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops sent this letter to all parishes encouraging them to celebrate National Marriage Week USA with these resources.

It's not too late to pick up the phone and call your local newspaper and radio station! Let folks know what you are doing for National Marriage Week USA.

Yours for strengthening marriage,
Sheila Weber, Executive Director
Heather Grizzle, Campaign Manager

National Marriage Week USA is part of International Marriage Week, with 20 major countries around the world now mobilizing leaders and events to strengthen marriage in their countries.

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National Marriage Week USA, 115 E 62nd Street, New York, NY 10065
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