Candidates for Friday Five (on Wed !)

1. Making the Case for Evidence-Based Decision-Making

 Jennifer Brooks



OR

Heritage Foundation Endorses Increased Use of Evidence in Budgeting for Trump Administration






2. Social Finance, Reflections on the South Carolina Nurse-Family Partnership Pay for Success Pilot (November 2016)
http://socialfinance.org/content/uploads/Charting-the-Course.pdf






3. The Cost of Late Intervention: EIF analysis 2016

Edited by: Haroon Chowdry and Peter Fitzsimons







4. Rehab, but for failing to adult.

 [Fusion / Molly Osberg]






5. Family study finds parents and kids agree


OR this version





Chap Records were basically Yelp for 1900s eligible bachelorettes. The books helped women keep track of—and review—their suitors.









7. Absent fathers no longer: men confront stereotypes to become involved parents

Livia Gershon



OR



8. Basic Engagement Resources





9. MU family researchers offer suggestions to improve co-parenting plans after divorce

ROSEANN SORCE, University of Missouri-Columbia



OR

What makes a family strong?
Michigan State University Extension

What do you think of when you hear the word “family?” You may consider your parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles. Some of you might ...



OR

UNH Research Finds White Deaths Exceed Births in One-Third of U.S. States



10. 'Today Will Be Different' Tackles Parenting Fatigue And Middle-Aged Marriage





11. Why teens leave the faith and what churches, families are doing about it








Thanks Alysse

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Fwd: [New post] Develop the habit of listening carefully and really understanding your partner BEFORE giving your thoughts (Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood)



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---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Intentional-Relationship.com Blog <comment-reply@wordpress.com>
Date: Tue, Dec 6, 2016 at 5:27 PM
Subject: [New post] Develop the habit of listening carefully and really understanding your partner BEFORE giving your thoughts (Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood)
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


intentional-relationship.com posted: "Active Listening is not easy to learn and do, but once it becomes a habit, it can transform your relationship forever. The seven habits are a step by step model that empower couples to be intentional, to make decisions and to act, to move towards a known"
Respond to this post by replying above this line

New post on Intentional-Relationship.com Blog

Develop the habit of listening carefully and really understanding your partner BEFORE giving your thoughts (Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood)

by intentional-relationship.com

Active Listening is not easy to learn and do, but once it becomes a habit, it can transform your relationship forever.

The seven habits are a step by step model that empower couples to be intentional, to make decisions and to act, to move towards a known destination rather than reacting to whatever is happening at the time. Emphasising the importance of self awareness before successful engagement with your partner, the model is a process of learning new habits to create personal and interpersonal effectiveness.

The seven habits are not a quick and easy formula for success, but together they form a powerful model for personal change. Adapted for couples, this series of posts is a respectful homage to Stephen R. Covey who died on July 16, 2012, age 79. Covey will be remembered as a transformational thinker on leadership and personal effectiveness. His book 'The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People' his most lasting legacy.

The seven habits can be divided into two groups - the first three focus on "private victory" and the second three on "public victory", with Habit 7 rounding the previous six to work towards refinement, self renewal and continuous improvement. Covey says "Private Victory precedes Public Victory" which means that you must master yourself before enjoying success outside of ourselves and with our partner.

    Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

    Stephen Covey believes this principle is the key to effective interpersonal communication. This habit is about communicating effectively with your partner, developing the habit of listening carefully and really understanding your partner BEFORE giving your thoughts.

    Also termed Active Listening, this habit is not easy to learn and do, but by really listening and understanding your partner - by truly listening, your relationship will be transformed. Its not about agreeing or disagreeing, its about seeing how your partner sees the world - through their heart and mind. Listening with empathy and having the courage to really stop and listen, to consider, to restrain, respect and act with reverence. This habit can bring immense intimacy and love to your marriage.

    To listen effectively requires us to arrest our ego, to contain our defensiveness and to reduce stonewalling. Its about probing and questioning without the desire to respond but with the intent to listen and understand - empathic communication. If you seek to understand your partners ideas and needs, sharing feelings and emotions and you also gain an accurate view without judgement, nor defending or attacking. Put your natural and automatic responses aside and focus on genuinely understanding your partner.

    It is often easier to give your opinion or to give advice. You may spend more time trying to get your partner to understand your position than listening and understanding their position. Ask questions that encourage further understanding such as "Tell me more..." or "What happened next...?" Encourage effective 2-way communication, seek to understand, then request to be understood in return.

    Using 'I statements' is a practical way of implementing this habit. Whilst using a 'You' statement points the finger or puts blame onto your partner, using I statements says how it is from your side, how you see it. I statements enable us to be clear about our feelings and to state what we need. I statements are assertive without arousing the defensive behaviour from your partner.

By listening and understanding your partner - by truly listening, your relationship can be renewed, and intimacy will follow. Be patient and seek to understand... you will get your chance to express your thoughts and feeling.

Tune in next week for Habit 6.

Reference: Covey, Stephen R., The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, 1989, Fireside, New York.

Take the Couple Checkup

Take the Couple Checkup 

The Couple Checkup generates deep and productive conversations that couples would not otherwise have about their relationship. These conversations restore insight and understanding about one another. The Couple Checkup can help to revive a relationship and increase intimacy. 

The Couple Checkup is an online couple assessment based on the PREPARE/ENRICH couple inventories. The Checkup assessment and Checkup report are designed to go directly to couples at any stage of their relationship (dating, engaged or married). The online system allows for dynamic customization of the assessment to each couple based on how the couple answers background questions. The goal is for the Couple Checkup to reach a more diverse group of couples, to empower couples to deal with issues on their own and to emphasize prevention over remediation.

For more information on the use and analysis of the Couple Checkup or to simply use the tool, please contact: www.couplecheckup.com.au or call today (02) 9520 4049 #couplecheckup #relationship

Need more information, email me now shane@intentional-relationship.com

Tune in next week for more relationship tips @ Intentional-Relationship.com



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Candidates for Friday Five


Robert H. Shmerling, MD, Faculty Editor, Harvard Health Publications






or

Call for Papers -- Contemporary Perspectives in Family Research
Dating, Mating, and Coupling
Date Due: January 31
Link to NCFR 





3. DC: Professor earns $3.2 million to study environmental impact on child health
The GW Hatchet (George Washington University) - November 30, 2016
A psychology professor is studying adopted children to better understand how children's environments can impact their health. Jody Ganiban, a professor of clinical and developmental psychology, along with two faculty members at other institutions, received a $3.2 million grant from the National Institutes of Health to conduct research on the genetic and environmental factors on childhood development.




4. Title: Let's Talk About Safe Kids and Strong Families [Alaska].
Published: 2016
Available from: Alaska Department of Health and Social Services, Division of Family and Youth Services.
PDF: http://dhss.alaska.gov/ocs/Documents/Publications/pdf/CommunityCafeReport_2016.pdf 
Abstract: This report shares findings from parent community cafes that were held in Alaska that investigated priorities to help strengthen families in their community using the ...






5. Strengthening the workforce to Support Community Living and Participation for Older Adults and People with Disabilities: Proceedings of a Workshop



or

Families Caring for an Aging America



or

Parenting Matters: 
Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8 (2016)







6. Divorce hits later, as couples stay together longer

Lucille Keen



or

Adult children backed on the right to sit tight




or


7. Military Families Matter: These Resources Help Build Family Resilience

Mikelle D. Smith, DCoE Public Affairs


or

A Collaborative Approach to Behavioral Health Care for Veterans and Their Families

by Nicole K. Eberhart, Michael Stephen Dunbar, Olena Bogdan, Lea Xenakis, Eric R. Pedersen, Terri Tanielian







8. 
FP-16-22
Marriage Rate in the U.S.: Geographic Variation, 2015
FP-16-21
Divorce Rate in the U.S.: Geographic Variation, 2015





9. Longevity Research: Unraveling the Determinants of Healthy Aging and Longer Life Spans






10. Parents as Partners results presented at Pro Bono Economics event



or

Cost of problems affecting children, young persons and families calculated at £17 billion





11. Repeatedly thinking about work-family conflict linked to health problems




Thanks Alysse.




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Fwd: Love Styles – An Online Taste of Oxygen Event



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---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: billandpat <billandpatcoffin@verizon.net>
Date: Thu, Dec 1, 2016 at 12:43 PM
Subject: Fwd: Love Styles – An Online Taste of Oxygen Event
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


 
 
----------Original Message----------

From: "Noel@Stronger Families"
Date: Dec 1, 2016 12:15:38 PM
Subject: Love Styles – An Online Taste of Oxygen Event
To: billandpatcoffin@verizon.net
 
image

JOIN US FOR AN ONLINE TASTE OF OXYGEN EVENT
UNDERSTANDING YOUR PARTNER'S LOVE STYLE
COMING UP THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8th

when: THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8th | where: YOUR COMPUTER
time: 5pm-6pm PST / 8pm-9pm EST
*FREE for ALL*

image

Discover the unique ways you and your partner receive love - so that you both recognize expressions of love for one another.

image

Are your emotional needs being met? Clarify both you and your partner's top emotional needs and how to meet them.

image

Learn 5 simple, proven ways to increase and sustain true intimacy.

SESSION INCLUDES:
(per person)

* DIGITAL STUDY GUIDE

In this 90 minute workshop you'll become equipped with helpful tools to strengthen your marriage or dating relationship. Get real, substantive answers to your questions that are designed to positively impact your relationship.

Thurs., December 8th, 2016
5:00pm-6:00pm PST/
8:00pm - 9:00pm EST
Online event only

For more information contact:
Caryn @ Stronger Families
event@strongerfamilies.org

image


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: billandpat <billandpatcoffin@verizon.net>
Date: Thu, Dec 1, 2016 at 12:43 PM
Subject: Fwd: Love Styles – An Online Taste of Oxygen Event
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


 
 
----------Original Message----------

From: "Noel@Stronger Families"
Date: Dec 1, 2016 12:15:38 PM
Subject: Love Styles – An Online Taste of Oxygen Event
To: billandpatcoffin@verizon.net
 
image

JOIN US FOR AN ONLINE TASTE OF OXYGEN EVENT
UNDERSTANDING YOUR PARTNER'S LOVE STYLE
COMING UP THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8th

when: THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8th | where: YOUR COMPUTER
time: 5pm-6pm PST / 8pm-9pm EST
*FREE for ALL*

image

Discover the unique ways you and your partner receive love - so that you both recognize expressions of love for one another.

image

Are your emotional needs being met? Clarify both you and your partner's top emotional needs and how to meet them.

image

Learn 5 simple, proven ways to increase and sustain true intimacy.

SESSION INCLUDES:
(per person)

* DIGITAL STUDY GUIDE

In this 90 minute workshop you'll become equipped with helpful tools to strengthen your marriage or dating relationship. Get real, substantive answers to your questions that are designed to positively impact your relationship.

Thurs., December 8th, 2016
5:00pm-6:00pm PST/
8:00pm - 9:00pm EST
Online event only

For more information contact:
Caryn @ Stronger Families
event@strongerfamilies.org

image

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Stronger Families PO Box 40584 Bellevue, Washington 98015 United States (425) 679-5671

Fwd: Time Out


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: MarriedPeople <nsquires@rethinkgroup.org>
Date: Fri, Nov 18, 2016 at 8:04 AM
Subject: Time Out
To: billcoffin68@gmail.com


New on the MarriedPeople blog today…
View this email in your browser

Time Out

Have you ever been in an argument that seemed to get out of hand? Voices get louder. Things are said that can be very hurtful and anger escalates. Is there anything that can be done? Is there a way to calm things down? The answer is "yes." Have you ever been watching a sporting event when things start to go bad for a team? What do we often see the coach do? He calls a "time out." During this "time out" the coach will try to refocus his players, let emotions calm down and prepare them to proceed with the game in a way that will help them to win. Read more »

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