Coffin Corner

Jan 3 HM Links & Clips

Countdown to a New Relationship with the One you already have
By Alfred and Lucinda Loveland
To learn more ways on how to handle stress or conflicts with your partner, attend a marriage education class in your neighborhood, visit http://www. smartmarriages.com/ for nationwide and http://www.camarriage.com/ for California . ...
Loveland Relationship - http://lovelandrelationship.blogspot.com/

HM Links and Clips (12/30/10)

10) Marriage And Work Problems Literature Review - Infospace.com Web ...

And Couple Relationships

Literature Review... Social Work in Education, 15(4), 225-232 .... citnews.unl.edu/marriage/help/research.html

The Happiness Project: Twenty-Three Phrases to Help You Fight Right.

8)Latino Marriage and Relationship Educator
Sufficient work in relationship education or marriage education along with some college considered. • Bicultural and Bilingual English and Spanish required ...
http://portland.craigslist.org/clc/npo/2135219116.html">portland.craigslist.org/clc/npo/2135219116.html

And Culturally Relevant Relationship, Marriage Education Curricula For ...
Developing Culturally Relevant Relationship and Marriage Education Curricula for …

7) NWA Healthy Marriages | Gary Smalley's Love & Laughter
Join Gary Smalley for a special 1-day marriage event as he presents his “Love & Laughter” seminar. Gary will reduce all of his marriage research and ...
www.nwamarriages.com/event_reg/eventinfo_vday.php

And http://www.nationalmarriageweekusa.org/events/

6) http://www.bettermarriages.org/?historyofacme and

A Marital Spark: 6 Principles For More Passion And Energy In Marriage | zen habits

5) The New Dad: Exploring Fatherhood within a Career Context, the Boston College Center for Work & Family http://www.bc.edu/cwf

And Taking the Child Out of Child Support
By Vincent DiCaro
As the nation's leading fatherhood organization, we often receive promotional materials for books about fatherhood. It's great to see more people writing …

4) Delaying Sex Might Strengthen Marriage
BusinessWeek
Waiting until marriage to have sex had the strongest correlations with positive outcomes. The study was controlled to eliminate the influence of factors ...
See all stories on this topic »

3) Supporting Healthy Marriage Evaluation: Early Lessons from the ...
M uses a rigorous research design to test the effectiveness of a new approac ...
www.ntis.gov/search/product.aspx?ABBR=PB2011103050

Or it’s free here http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/opre/whats_new.html

2) Quotes For Love
Time, effort, and imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and growing. ~Jim Rohn ~ Families are the compass that guide ...
www.squidoo.com/quotes-for-love

Married to a college football fan? I feel your pain | Deseret News

I hope to see some of you next summer here Healthy Marriages - Healthy Families Conference

or here http://www.bettermarriages.org/?register

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education, retired

ACF/HHS

301-625-7737(h) billcoffin68@gmail.com

…We, Government Leaders, invite colleagues and citizens from every political party to engage in renewed

efforts to pursue laws and public policies that promote the well-being of marriages and families…(Excerpt from http://www.hamptonu.edu/ncaamp/proclamation/)

A Guide to Low-Cost Curricula and Resources: Marriage and Relationship, Fatherhood and Parenting,
and Financial Education available at http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage/pdf/curricula_resources_guide_121509.pdf

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage/doc/ACF_Curriculum_Assessment_Guide.doc

http://learning.hhs.gov/elearning/cop.asp

Why Marriage Matters, 26 Conclusions from the Social Sciences

#1 Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers and mothers have good relationships with their children.

#26 A child who is not living with his or her own two married parents is at greater risk for child abuse.

http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=7

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

Note: Most of these links still work

Be sure to visit www.healthymarriageinfo.org frequently for the most current information and resources on healthy marriage. Do you know someone who would enjoy our e-mail alerts? Pass it along and share the healthy marriage knowledge. Sign up now.

http://www.futureofchildren.org/futureofchildren/publications/journals/journal_details/index.xml?journalid=37

http://www.camarriage.com/home/index.ashx?nv=2

http://www.marriedwithspecialchildren.com/

http://www.extension.iastate.edu/marriage/

http://www.aahmi.net/files/mapping.html

http://www.arfamilies.org/family_life/marriage/default.htm

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/ofa/grantees/list10-06.htm

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/ofa/hmabstracts/index.htm

http://www.healthymarriageinfo.org

http://www.foryourmarriage.org/interior_template.asp?id=20398706

http://www.smartmarriages.org http://www.smartmarriages.com/app/Newsletter.Subscribe

http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html

http://fatherhood.hhs.gov/Marriage/index.shtml

http://center.americanvalues.org

http://www.bettermarriages.org

http://www.aces.edu/pubs/docs/H/HE-0829/HE-0829.pdf

http://www.peerta.acf.hhs.gov/index.cfm?event=viewTopic&sectionTopicId=14#marriage

http://www.marriagesavers.org/sitems/index.htm

http://www.usrelationships.org/

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/opre/project/projectIndex.jsp#strengthen

http://www.afterschool.ed.gov/programs/opre/strengthen/compreh_frmwk/reports/comp_frmwk/comp_frmwk_toc.html

http://www.religion-online.org/showbook.asp?title=1900

http://www.buildingstrongfamilies.info

http://www.supportinghealthymarriage.org/index.html

http://marriagecalculator.acf.hhs.gov/marriage/

http://www.marriagemagazine.org

http://www.couplecare.info/CcareAbstracts.htm

http://www.okmarriage.org http://www.familiesok.org

http://www.f4agm.blogspot.com/

http://unlforfamilies.unl.edu/

http://www.healthymarriagesgr.org/

http://futuronow.org/

http://www.helpourmarriage.org/

http://flweb211.myflorida.com/list_need.asp?id=19

http://www.uga.edu/prosaam/index.html

http://www.thecompassionatecommunity.com/issues/marriage.php

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/marriage/interviews/horn.html

http://www.beechacres.org/family/home.asp

http://www.familyfacts.org/results.cfm?Key=7

http://www.addictionandfamily.org/

http://www.hec.ohio-state.edu/eseminars/RME

http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=34927&pf=3&page=1

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/opre/strengthen/serv_delivery/reports/systematic_rev/sys_intro.html

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/19/health/psychology/19coup.html?ex=1163048400&en=1e292c472107459b&ei=5070

http://www.blackwell-synergy.com/doi/full/10.1111/j.1741-3729.2006.00418.x

http://www.familiesok.org/

http://www.familyministries.org/FirstYearsForever/archive.htm

http://www.childtrends.org/Files/CT_HealthyMarriage.pdf

http://www.gcmarriage.org/

http://www.winst.org/princetonprinciples/contents.html

http://aspe.hhs.gov/hsp/06/OMI/rb.pdf

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/intimate/table/wommar.htm

http://www.brookings.edu/events/2008/0516_healthy_marriage.aspx

http://www.rd.com/openContentCategory.do?contentCategoryId=703

http://marriage.rutgers.edu/

http://www.hhs.gov/children/index.shtml#family

http://www.americanvalues.org/index.html#marriage

http://www.anthemnorthtexas.org/

http://www.wyofams.org/

http://www.alabamamarriage.org/

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/17/fashion/weddings/17FIELDBOX.html?ex=1186290000&en=f3ad001932193004&ei=5087&excamp=mkt_at4

http://www.familybridgeschicago.org/

http://www.foundationformarriage.org/

http://ssw.unc.edu/jif/

http://www.marriedandlovingit.org/

http://www.strongbonds.org/skins/strongbonds/display.aspx

http://www.nrepp.samhsa.gov/programfulldetails.asp?PROGRAM_ID=86

http://healthymarriagetips.com/Money.htm

HM Links & Clips (12/29/10) #161

10) High Plains Coalition: Academic Achievement
THE CASE FOR MARRIAGE EDUCATION AS CRITICAL FOR SCHOOL ACHIEVEMENT: Children from divorced homes perform more poorly in reading, spelling and math and ...

Divorce Research: Top Findings of 2010

8) Kent Bush: Tell other couples you're not perfect We all could do better reaching out to our friends who are having trouble in relationships instead of comparing notes about what we have heard on the grapevine. Showing another couple the mountains you've climbed can make their molehills seem less daunting. http://www.timesreporter.com/archive/x1882974303/Kent-Bush-Tell-other-couples-youre-not-perfect

7) Benefits in Delaying Sex Until Marriage
WebMD
... was in marriage ...” Sign up today for WebMD's Sex & Relationships newsletter and get trusted information that will help keep your relationships healthy ...
See all stories on this topic »

6) Study of twins confirms marriage reduces bad behaviour http://www.ionainstitute.org/index.php?id=1196

5) http://www.womansday.com/Articles/Family-Lifestyle/Relationships/The-5-Stages-of-a-Marriage.html

4) The Four Horsemen | in Chapter 16: SFL | from Psychology: An Introduction by Russ Dewey

And

How to Fight Fair in Marriage

3) http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/2010/12/29/expertnet-wiki-update and http://foryourmarriage.org/

2) Marriage Proposal | Engagement Video | Rockefeller Center | Christmas (Wonder if they have the skills to survive and thrive in marriage—BC)

1) Couples Grow Old, Happy and Sad Together
Fox News
"There are all kinds of changes in perception that occur over the course of a marriage that make you look at it ...

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

Billcoffin68@gmail.com

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

HM Links & Clips (12/28/10) #160

10) Penn State Live - Relationship-strengthening class improves life ...

… "Parents should not underestimate the importance of the types of support they provide for one another for their child's welfare," said Feinberg. "The fact is that children's well-being is dependent on parents' interactions."

And PDF of Family Foundations Overview - Summary

9) On Forgiveness (NYT)

By CHARLES L. GRISWOLD In order to forgive others, victims must put aside revenge. But what are the other conditions of true forgiveness?

8) 2010 December « The Black Wives' Club
To our knowledge, ProSAAM is the first major marriage education curriculum to so thoroughly focus on prayer as a fundamental element of what is taught. ...

7) My New Year's Resolution: Save Marriage
Huffington Post (blog)
All the women in my life urged me to keep my marriage together. "Relationships have ups and downs," my sage girlfriend Lisa would counsel. ...

6) Project focusing on fatherhood
Buffalo News
By Jay Rey A local video producer and radio personality is going public with an issue he believes needs to be discussed in the black community: fatherhood. ...

And Fathers in the News - Top Fatherhood Stories of 2010
Many fathers have been in the news during 2010, and a number of important stories about fathers and fatherhood have appeared in the news as well.

5) http://www.markmerrill.com/2010/12/28/10-ways-to-push-your-spouse-away/#

4) Register now: Mastering the Mysteries of Love Communication Training
... the marriages and relationships of our church members, as well as others. This course is great to incorporate in a Marriage Education Ministry. ...
www.uts.edu/faculty/287.html

3) Yes, That's So Wrong
Kathryn Lopez, Townhall.com

2) http://www.allprodad.com/top10/marriage/10-creative-ways-to-spend-more-time-with-your-wife#

And

35 Gifts Your Children Will Never Forget | Becoming Minimalist

1. And one for your parents A Tribute: The Best Gift You Can Give Your Parents - FamilyLife.com

Over the last decade, hundreds of people have written to describe how they took my advice and wrote a special Tribute to their parents. ...
www.familylife.com/site/apps/nl/content3.asp?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b...

1) Gregory Kane: In praise of Daniel Patrick Moynihan 45 years later

Read more at the Washington Examiner: http://washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/columnists#ixzz19RdPK1YM

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

ACF/HHS

370 L’Enfant Promenade, SW Washington, DC 20447

(202)260-1550(o); email address starting next week is billcoffin68@gmail.com

…We, Government Leaders, invite colleagues and citizens from every political party to engage in renewed

efforts to pursue laws and public policies that promote the well-being of marriages and families…(Excerpt from http://www.hamptonu.edu/ncaamp/proclamation/)

Why Marriage Matters, 26 Conclusions from the Social Sciences

#1 Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers and mothers have good relationships with their children.

#26 A child who is not living with his or her own two married parents is at greater risk for child abuse.

http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=7

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

From: 33questions@aweber.com on behalf of Michael Webb
[33questions@theromantic.com]
Sent: Monday, December 27, 2010 9:07 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]Michael Webb's Secrets of Blissful
Relationships

X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O

Secrets of Blissful Relationships

from Michael Webb, the web's #1 relationship author and expert

X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O ~ X ~ O

Love, Marriage and Sex
by Michael Webb

The other day a friend was sharing with Athena and me that when their first son was born they were so excited at the new adventure that they did some things they later regretted. One of those things was to begin feeding him solid foods when he was only two months old. Practically every authority recommends that you wait until a baby is at least five or six months until they begin eating foods.
Their digestive systems aren't typically mature enough to handle solids and you greatly increase a child's chance of having allergies and other problems if you introduce food too soon.

Now here is some advice many of you probably don't want to hear about what you shouldn't do early on in your relationship and I'll probably get a lot of nasty mail because of it. But I don't write on tough issues to be popular. I write it to help people have blissful relationships.

If you want to have a blissful relationship, don't ruin the chances by introducing things into your relationship until you are ready for it.

I'm constantly bewildered when people can't figure out why they keep having failed relationships when they muddle them with physical intimacy. It's fairly common for couples to kiss on their first date, begin caressing soon afterwards and start a sexual relationship within a few weeks or months of knowing each other.

While I'm not going to tell you how long you should wait to begin kissing, hugging and making non-sexual contact, I'm going to boldly state that our bodies and minds are not designed for sexual relationships until marriage/life-time commitment. The two go hand and hand and to try to separate them causes a lot of emotional turmoil in our relationships.

The average American has ten sexual partners before they are married. They either think each partner is "the one" or they think sex is so wonderful they don't want to miss out on the opportunity.
Sex is indeed wonderful and very special and saving it for the wedding night is treating it as something special. Sharing it with practically everyone you date makes it rather ordinary.

Here are just a few of the emotional problems pre-marital sex can
cause:
* When you sleep with someone you aren't married to, they begin to get concerned with how many other people you have slept with. * If you are willing to have sex with someone you aren't married to, will you feel the same after you are married? Rates of affairs are dramatically higher with those who engage in lots of pre-marital sex compared to those who were virgins when married.

* One has a tendency to compare themselves with their mate's previous conquests. Since sexual relationships were designed for married couples, your mind naturally begins pushing the relationship further along than where you might be.

* You might not even know the person you are sleeping with but you start forming an emotional attachment to them. Many couples who really shouldn't be together are married because a pre-marital sexual relationship "bonded" them together when they wouldn't have bonded without being physically intimate.

I've talked with quite a few people who waited to begin a sexual relationship until they were married and none of them have regretted it. I've chatted with numerous people who began a sexual relationship before the wedding and practically all of them had regrets. Now, I am NOT advocating that you blindly marry someone without knowing their thoughts, ideas, dreams and wishes are regarding sex.
My 1000 Questions for Couples has 100s of questions about sex that should be discussed prior to marriage. You can get it here:
http://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=Cm0Sd&m=1ppK_KGheTyje1&b=3Tr3Y_Xzf3CFz8yYGbIMww While waiting to have sex until you are married won't guarantee a blissful relationship, it will certainly cause your mate to honor and respect you much more than if you didn't.

Love, marriage and sex -- let's keep them in that order.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

82% Give THIS For Christmas

I was reading a survey the other day that 82% of couples report that lovemaking was one of the *gifts* given for the holidays.

**FOR LADIES**
If you want to shock and delight your man then read these smokin hot tips from Jill Rilla.
She is phenomenal!!!!

HOT!!!! --> www.TheRomantic.com/smokin.htm

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~

W H O I S M I C H A E L W E B B Michael Webb is: Athena's loving husband. Best-selling author (over a dozen books). Media Celebrity (over 500 TV & Radio appearances). Founder, TheRomantic.com. Founder, National Resurrect Romance Week (2nd week in August). Founder, Love One Another Charitable Foundation

..........................................................

Y O U R S U B S C R I P T I O N

Our records indicate that Bill at bcoffin@acf.hhs.gov requested information by e-mail from our company at http://www.theromantic.com/33questionssub.htm

Date: April 25, 2009
IP: 173.66.19.253

PO Box 1567, Cary, NC 27512, USA

To unsubscribe or change subscriber options visit:
http://www.aweber.com/z/r/?LJwMLKystCzsHAwsLAxstGa0bMwcLMwsjA==

From: First Things First [ftf@firstthings.org]
Sent: Monday, December 27, 2010 4:18 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]A Note from First Things First

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American writer and cartoonist

Click here for a sixty-second message from First Things First

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From: Ozarks Marriage Matters [phyllis@forest.ccsend.com] on behalf of Ozarks Marriage Matters [newsletter@ozarksmarriagematters.org]
Sent: Tuesday, December 28, 2010 5:32 AM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]OMM News & Notes - December 28, 2010

In This Issue:

Sit Back, Relax, and Take a Minute ...
Merry Christmas from the Operation Us Staff
One Hour Host Training for Individuals or Couples January 5, 2011
Getaway Together Marriage Retreat - January 14-15, 2011
Keep an Eye Out for Our New Billboard Series
Ask Your Relationship Questions

OMM News & Notes: Promoting Healthy Relationships December 28, 2010

Just in Case You Missed It . . . We're Repeating Last Week's Newsletter!

Sit Back, Relax and Take a Minute . . .

by Dr. Jennifer Baker

We know you're busy. It's that time of the year, but today we hope you'll take just a few minutes to sit back, relax and listen to area folks talking about the impact Operation Us has had in their lives and the lives of people they know and serve. All you need to do is click on the links below to hear firsthand from people who've worked with the Operation Us project and seen the benefits. -->

If you still have some doubts about how valuable it can be for your faith community to be involved with the work of Operation Us and Ozarks Marriage Matters, click on the link below to hear 417 area clergy talking about the impact Operation Us has had in their church and community.

HM Links & Clips (12/27/10) #159 (same # as 2008)

10) http://www.assets4families.org/index.html and Register Now - Region VI Family Strengthening Summit

9) Marriage keeps you healthy: study - Silobreaker
Marriage keeps you healthy, even though it can make men fat, U.S. government researchers said on Wednesday. Married people are less likely to smoke, ...

And The Middle Class Constantly Seeks Stability
Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, New York Times “Room for Debate” blog, 12/23/10

8) 2010-12 Winter Newsletter
At Healthy Marriages, you can find opportunities to reach out and help another .... If you would like to host a Healthy Marriage event, give us a call! ...

And Effective Family Strengthening Interventions | PDFChaser | Best ...
The focus of OJJDP's Family Strengthening Series is to provide assistance to ongoing ... to repli-cate these findings and to further explore the elements of ...

7) Give kids happy, healthy marriage
Monroe News Star
Say you don't have a healthy marriage? Do something in 2011 to change that. Attend a marriage retreat. Read a marriage book. There are dozens of excellent ...

And The B.E.S.T. (Building and Enriching Stronger Tennessee) Families ...
implementing the marriage education program. From this information, the .... respondents felt people should be required to take a marriage education course ...

6) New Webinar: Planning and Applying for Fatherhood Funding | Alliance1
This webinar is in response to the federal government's recent authorization of $75 million for fatherhood programming in the 2011 fiscal year. ...

And National Partnership for Community Leadership (NPCL)
Purchase copies of The Fatherhood Development Curriculum at reduced rates. ... The NPCL Fatherhood Development Curriculum has the distinction of being the ...

And Integrating Healthy Marriage Skills in Responsible Fatherhood Programs

5) Healthy Relationship | PDF Finder | PDF Search Engine
Appealing to Teens to Participate in Healthy Marriage/ Relationship Education Appealing to Teens to Participate in Healthy Marriage/Relationship Education ...

And NIHMP BROCHURE - gt I Nbrak
American communities about the value of healthy marriages ... l would like to introduce the Nebraska Indian Healthy Marriage. Project and the NIH MP Staff. ...

4) Michele Weiner-Davis: Terri, Thanks for writing such a thoughtful ...
But good marriage therapy and marriage education can radically change a marriage . Seeking help rather than an affair partner, is my preferred solution. ...
www.huffingtonpost.com/.../the-state-of-affairs_b_795993_71...

And Google Answers: Granular statistics on US divorce rate.

3) High Plains Coalition: Get Involved
Attend a Marriage Education or Relationship Skills class, and tell your friends ... Receive training to become a facilitator of a Marriage Education or ...

2) About 7000 more Iowans to qualify for food assistance
Radio Iowa
The flyer cites a variety of statistics, noting that spouses in a healthy marriage are less likely to drink heavily or use marijuana and their children ...

And Should Parents Fight In Front Of Kids?
WDSU New Orleans
Fights meant divorce in my mind. My parents generally argued over money and the stress associated with it, along with daily issues such as the laundry and ...

1) Smart Marriages®: Time and Hax / Worst Relationship Songs / Famili ...
By Diane
Fatherhood and Marriage Leadership Institute ----------------------------------- -------- - FOR INFORMATION about how to post to the Smart Marriages® newslist; subscribe or UNSUBSCRIBE, or an archive of all past posts: ...

And Smart Marriages®: Without Daddy/ Cast in America/ Top 10 / Eclipse ...
By Diane
Doing Without/ You Saved Me · Invitation to be Part Marriage Education history . .. FAQs / Twilight Toll on Marriage (really?) / Child... NPR Link / Innovations in divorce prevention / NYS... On NPR today / Fundraising and Partnerships ...

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

ACF/HHS

370 L’Enfant Promenade, SW Washington, DC 20447

(202)260-1550(o);

Billcoffin68@gmail.com (new email address starting in Jan)

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

HM Links & Clips (12/14/10) #151 - Coffin Corner
4) Links - Mississippi Healthy Marriage Initiative ... Another seeming contradiction to working at a healthy marriage nonprofit is that I am the product of ...

From: National Marriage Project [marriage@virginia.edu]
Sent: Friday, December 24, 2010 12:15 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]News from National Marriage Project

Follow Up Flag: Follow Up
Flag Status: Red

Having trouble viewing this email? Click here

National Marriage Project Newsletter

National Marriage Project Update December, 2010

Mission

The National Marriage

Project (NMP) is a

nonpartisan,

nonsectarian,

and interdisciplinary

initiative located at

the University of

Virginia. The Project's

mission is to provide

research and analysis on

the health of marriage in

America, to analyze the

social and cultural forces

shaping contemporary

marriage, and to identify

strategies to increase

marital quality and

stability.

New Research:

When Marriage Disappears
On Monday, Dec. 6, 2010, the National Marriage Project and the Institute for American Values released the latest edition of The State of Our Unions. This year's edition offers an essay entitled, "When Marriage Disappears: The Retreat from Marriage in Middle America." The report chronicles the waning fortunes of marriage in Middle America, as well as the cultural, economic, and religious roots of the retreat from marriage in Middle America. It also explains why marriage is getting stronger among highly educated and affluent Americans. http://www.virginia.edu/marriageproject/ -->

In the News:

The National Marriage Project was featured in a recent New York Times "Room for Debate" roundtable on cohabitation and remarriage:

<SPAN style

HM Links & Clips (12/23/10) #158

10) Domestic violence program rates 10 worst relationship songs - Daily Dose - Boston.com

http://www.boston.com/lifestyle/health/blog/dailydose/2010/12/domestic_violen.html

9) Pinky Swears are Worthless and Other Lessons Divorce Teaches Our Children Well

Huffington Post (blog) - ‎16 hours ago‎

This year marks the 40th anniversary of the release of the Crosby, Stills Nash & Young hit song "Teach Your Children." It's also the 40th anniversary of the ...

And A Grandmother Struggles With Divorce

Huffington Post (blog) - ‎Dec 22, 2010‎

When an adult child's marriage ends, it's not just the divorcing couple and their children who are hurt. What many people do not realize is that the ...

8) http://www.markmerrill.com/2010/12/14/8-outside-the-box-date-ideas/#

7) National Fatherhood Initiative :: Military Fatherhood Award™ Ceremony
The Military Fatherhood Award™ recognizes a military dad who goes above and beyond his duties as both serviceman and dad to make sure he and his family stay ...

6) BYU study says delaying sex may promote better marriage
Salt Lake Tribune
By Brian Maffly Delaying sex could lead to healthier marriages, particularly in the quality of a couple's communication, new research out of Brigham Young ...
See all stories on this topic »

5) Fewer Teen Moms but More Babies Born to Single Moms Than Ever ...
Furthermore, marriage education for low-income adults and high school students should be put into place to help couples learn the skills to sustaining a ...

4) Reno healthy marriage Articles, Reno healthy marriage News ...
Read the latest Reno healthy marriage news and view Reno healthy marriage pictures from our team of local insiders.

3) http://www.youtube.com/camarriage and http://www.centerforpublicconversation.org/

2) Random Samplings is the official blog of the U.S. Census Bureau. Experts from around the Census Bureau describe the objectives of their work and explain census and survey results. Learn more at http://blogs.census.gov/censusblog/

1) The Association for Library Service to Children (ALSC) recently updated their "Best Websites for Kids" directory.

And on Friday kids (or those who are still kids at heart) can track Santa's progress around the world online with the NORAD Santa Tracker.

Merry Christmas,

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

ACF/HHS

370 L’Enfant Promenade, SW Washington, DC 20447

(202)260-1550(o);

Bill.Coffin@acf.hhs.gov

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

From: thinkmarriage [info@thinkmarriage.org]
Sent: Thursday, December 23, 2010 9:07 AM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: December Newsletter

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HM Links & Clips (12/22/10) #157 (part 3)

The National CampaignFrom: The National Campaign [web@thenc.org]
Sent: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 12:36 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: Teen Birth Rate Hits Record Low

December 21, 2010

Teen Birth Rate Hits Record Low
New Survey: Teens Say Parents Most Influence Their Decisions About Sex
Survey Also Reveals One-Third of Teens Believe Birth Control Doesnt Work

Press Release
For Immediate Release
December 21, 2010

Contact: Bill Albert, 202-478-8510/balbert@thenc.org

(Washington, DC) --- The teen birth rate in the United States declined 6% in 2009 and is now at a record low, according to new data released today by the Centers for Disease Control and Preventions National Center for Health Statistics. Rates declined among older and younger teens and among all racial and ethnic groups. For example, the birth rate among Hispanic teens declined 10% in 2009 and is now at a record low.

Good news just in time for the holidays a steep decline in teen births, said Sarah Brown, CEO of The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. It is now apparent that the increase in the teen birth rate noted in 2007 and 2008 was only a hiccup a blip in the longer term, two-decade decline in teen births. We now are, thankfully, back on track. The credit and praise goes to teens themselves for making better decisions about their lives today and their plans for the future.

Brown continued, Still, The Grinch among us recognizes that what goes down can go back up again. Even when the news is good, it is essential that parents, practitioners, policymakers, and really anyone who cares about teenagers remember that the U.S. still has the highest rates of teen pregnancy and births among comparable countries and that we all need to continue helping teens postpone their families until they are older, through school, and in stable, committed relationships.

A new public opinion survey released today by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy provides some important context for the new birth data. Two of the toplines from With One Voice 2010, a nationally representative telephone survey of 1,008 young people (aged 12-19) and 1,000 adults (age 20 and older), are:

Teens (46%) say parents most influence their decisions about sex. By comparison, only 20% say friends most influence their decisions.
Although 78% of teens say they have all the information they need to avoid an unplanned pregnancy, one-third (34%) agree it doesnt matter whether you use birth control or not, when it is your time to get pregnant, it will happen, and half (49%) admit that they know little or nothing about condoms and how to use them.

Other findings from the survey of teens and adults include:

Parents

Eight in ten teens (80%) say that it would be much easier for teens to delay sexual activity and avoid teen pregnancy if they were able to have more open, honest conversations about these topics with their parents.
Six in ten teens (63%) agree that the primary reason teens dont use contraception is because they are afraid that their parents will find out.

Sex Education

Many teens (46%) and most adults (73%) wish young people were getting more information about both abstinence and contraception rather than either/or. By comparison, 18% of teens say they want more information about birth control and 9% want more information about abstinence. The overwhelming majority of teens (87%) and adults (93%) also agree it is important for teens to be given a strong message that they should not have sex until they are at least out of high school.

Teen Pregnancy, Education, and Religion

About nine in ten teens (91% of girls and 87% of boys) and two-thirds of adults (66%) say that teen pregnancy is a very important problem in the United States and nearly all adults (89%) believe there should be a direct effort in their community to prevent teen pregnancy.
About nine in ten teens (87%) and adults (90%) believe reducing teen pregnancy is a very effective way to reduce the high school dropout rate and improve academic achievement.
Most teens (73%) and adults (70%) believe religious leaders and faith groups should be doing more to help prevent teen pregnancy.

Media

Among those teens who have watched MTVs 16 and Pregnant, 82% think the show helps teens better understand the challenges of teen pregnancy and parenthood and how to avoid it.
More broadly, most teens (79% of girls and 67% of boys) agree with the statement: When a TV show or character I like deals with teen pregnancy, it makes me think more about my own risk of becoming pregnant/causing a pregnancy and how to avoid it.

Sex, Regret, Relationships, and Sexting

Among those teens who have had sex, most (65% of girls and 57% of boys) say they wish they had waited longer.
Most teens (93% of girls and 88% of boys) say they would rather have a boyfriend/girlfriend and not have sex than have sex but not have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Most teens (71%) agree that sharing nude or semi-nude images of themselves or other teens electronically through cell phones, websites, and/or social media networks leads to more sex in real life.

About the survey and The National Campaign. Click here to read the survey in its entirety, including the wording of the polling questions and the exact methodology; click here for a fact sheet on the new teen birth rate data. The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy seeks to improve the lives and future prospects of children and families. Our specific strategy is to prevent teen pregnancy and unplanned pregnancy among single, young adults. We support a combination of responsible values and behavior by both men and women and responsible policies in both the public and private sectors.

©2010, The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy
1776 Massachusetts Ave., NW, Suite 200, Washington, DC 20036
ph: (202) 478-8507. fax: (202) 478-8588. CFC #10496
http://www.TheNationalCampaign.org

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From: California Healthy Marriages Coalition [patty@camarriage.ccsend.com] on behalf of California Healthy Marriages Coalition [kerri@camarriage.com]
Sent: Wednesday, December 22, 2010 1:27 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]Season's Greetings from California Healthy Marriages Coalition

Having trouble viewing this email? Click here

Season's Greetings!

We send you our warmest wishes for a happy holiday season!

We also want to extend a heartfelt thank you for your important contribution to creating lasting, successful marriages and families in California, including investing in your own relationships.

As the year comes to a close, we are celebrating some great impacts made during 2010. Through our 28 partnering organizations, we touched the lives of nearly 2,500 high school students, 3,000 singles, and 8,700 married Californians with skills-building Relationship Education classes. This means that over the past four years, more than 65,000 people have gained the skills to better connect and communicate in their relationships!

We look forward to continuing with you into the coming year. Great things are in store for 2011, including a new look and name for CHMC. Look for more news after the New Year!

All the best to you and your loved ones,

California Healthy Marriages Coalition

A special "thank you" to our partners and supporters for your contributions to impacting the lives of over 14,000 Californians this year:

Health and Human Services/Administration for Children and Families/Office of Family Assistance
First 5 LA
First 5 San Bernardino
AMOR de Orange County
Catholic Family Movement
Catholic Diocese of San Bernardino
Center for the Empowerment of Families
The Clinebell Institute
Community Christian Center
The Dibble Institute
East Bay Healthy Marriage and Fatherhood Initiative
Family Saver Center
Formacion Matrimonial
Fuller Institute for Relationship Education
GIFT Counseling and Wellness Center
Happy Families
Healthy Marriage Coalition of Fresno/Madera County
IMPACT South Bay
International Institute of Los Angeles
Korean Churches for Community Development
Los Angeles H.A.L.O.
MAPS 4 College
National Hispanic Christian Leadership Conference
OCMarriage
Relate for Life
Relationship Research Foundation
Relationship Skills Unlimited
REnovando Familias
Saints Healthy Marriage Project
Smart Marriages (Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education)
Solutions 4 Families
Talk It Out
Yuba-Sutter Healthy Marriage Coalition

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HM Links & Clips (12/22/10) #157 (part 2)

From: National Center for Family & Marriage Research [national_center_for_marriage_research@ncmr-bgsu.ccsend.com] on behalf of National Center for Family & Marriage Research [ncfmr@bgsu.edu]
Sent: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 2:50 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]NCFMR News and Notes - December 2010

News and Notes

December 2010

Welcome
The National Center for Family & Marriage Research (NCFMR), established in 2007 at Bowling Green State University (BGSU), welcomes you to News and Notes, our monthly electronic newsletter. News and Notes aims to keep you informed about the activities of the NCFMR. We will also announce funding and research opportunities, provide registration information for conferences and workshops, and keep you up to date on current research findings.

What's New at the NCFMR...

The following updates may be viewed on the NCFMR website.

Request for Proposals: Small Grants Competition, 2011
Fathers and Fathering
Application Receipt Deadline: Friday, February 18, 2011

The National Center for Family & Marriage Research seeks to fund up to four proposals ($20,000 per award) to support innovative research that contributes to theoretical, conceptual, or methodological developments about fathers and fathering.

View Request for Proposal (RFP)
Link to External Grants webpage

Examine Our Newly Released Data Resources
Our extensive data resources facilitate research on families and well-being. Be sure to examine our newly released additions to the following collections: Data Points, The Date Source, Measures Snapshots, and Working Paper Series.

Data Points
Tables and figures integrating statistics and demographic perspectives designed to investigate the links between marriage and family well-being at all stages of the life course.

Parental Incarceration

View Data Points webpage

The Data Source
Documents describing newly released data sets, such as American Community Survey (ACS), Monitoring the Future (MTF), and National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG), used by the family research community.

View The Data Source webpage

Measures Snapshots
A collection of detailed summaries of family measures available in several large, national data sets.

Child Well-being
National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health (Add Health)
Waves 3 & 4

View Measures Snapshots webpage

Working Papers
A collection of working papers written by faculty affiliates, researchers, and advanced graduate students.

Michal Grinstein-Weiss, Pajarita Charles, Shenyang Guo, Kim Manturuk, and Clinton Key (2009 External Grantees)
The Effect of Marital Status on Homeownership Among Low-Income Households (WP-10-18)

View Working Paper Series webpage

Congratulations to Professor Gary Lee
BGSU NCFMR Research Affiliate Awarded the Designation of 2010 NCFR Fellow

Fellow status in the National Council on Family Relations is an honor awarded to relatively few living members of NCFR who have made outstanding and enduring contributions to the field of the family in the areas of scholarship, teaching, outreach, or professional service. NCFMR congratulates Dr. Lee on his achievement!

View Dr. Lee's biography and CV

Birth Rate for Women 40-44 Rose to Highest Level Reported in 40+ Years

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's National Center for Health Statistics presents data on U.S. births according to a wide variety of measures, such as maternal demographic characteristics and birth and fertility rates.

Gap in Married and Unmarried Birth Rate Narrows

^a Births to married women per 1,000 married women aged 15-44 years.
^bBirths to unmarried women per 1,000 unmarried women aged 15-44 years.
Adapted from Table C "Births and birth rates for unmarried and married women, United States: 1980, 1985 and 1990-2008" by, J.A. Martin, B.E. Hamilton, P.D. Sutton, S.J. Ventura, and M.J.K. Mathews Osterman, 2010, Births: Final data for 2008, National vital statistics reports, Vol 59, No 1. by the National Center for Health Statistics. http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr59/nvsr59_01.pdf

-->

National Science Foundation (NSF) Offers Grant Opportunities

American Educational Research Association (AERA) Grants Program
Deadline: January 10, 2011
Supported by NSF, The AERA Grants Program fosters advanced scientific study of education and learning using large-scale data sets collected or supported by the National Center for Education Statistics (NCES), NSF, or other federal agencies.

The following research initiatives and institutes have set January 2011 deadlines.

AERA Dissertation Grants -- For detailed information, visit...
http://www.aera.net/grantsprogram/res_training/diss_grants/DGFly.html

AERA Research Grants -- For detailed information, visit...
http://www.aera.net/grantsprogram/res_training/res_grants/RGFly.html

AERA Institute on Statistical Analysis for Education Policy: Transitions from High School to College -- For detailed information, visit...
http://www.aera.net/grantsprogram/res_training/stat_institute/SIFly.html

AERA Faculty Institute for the Teaching of Statistics with Large-Scale Data Sets -- For detailed information, visit...
http://www.aera.net/grantsprogram/res_training/stat_institute/SIFacFly.html

If you have further questions, please contact:

Ming Lowe
Program Manager
AERA Grants Program
202-238-3200, ext. 227
grantsprogram@aera.net

Link to AERA website

Upcoming Events

January 2011

Call for Papers -- American Sociological Association (ASA) 2011 Annual Meeting
Social Conflict: Multiple Dimensions and Arenas
Date Due: January 13
Link to ASA

Call for Applications -- Postdoctoral Fellowships, 2011
Research and Training Program on Poverty and Public Policy
Date Due: January 14
Link to NPC

Call for Papers -- 2nd Annual IGSS Conference
Integrating Genetics and the Social Sciences
Date Due: January 15
Link to IGSS

Call for Papers -- MPRC, NICHD, Economic Research Service, and IZA
International Perspectives on Time Use
Date Due: January 15
Link to Maryland Population Research Center

Request for Proposals -- University of Kentucky Center for Poverty Research (UKCPR)
Research Program on Childhood Hunger
Date Due: January 25
Link to UKCPR

Research Paper Competitions -- ICPSR
Undergraduates and Master's Students
Date Due: January 31
Link to ICPSR

February 2011

Ohio Association of Community Action Agencies (OACAA)
2011 Winter Legislative Conference
Date: February 2-4
Link to OACAA

2011 International Conference on Parent Education and Parenting
Changing Families in a Changing World
Date: February 10-11
Link to UNT

Call for Applications -- Center for Population Research in LGBT Health
Pre-Doctoral Mentoring Program in LGBT Health Research
Date Due: February 15
Link to Center for Population Research in LGBT Health

Call for Applications -- Inter-university Consortium for Political and Social Research (ICPSR)
Summer Undergraduate Internship Program -- 2011
Date Due: February 15
Link to ICPSR

March 2010

Call for Proposals -- National Council on Family Relations (NCFR) 73rd Annual Conference
Families and the Shifting Economy
Date Due: March 1
Link to NCFR

Southeastern Council on Family Relations (SECFR) Conference
We Shall Overcome: Changing the Status Quo for Families in the Southeast
Date: March 3-4
Link to SECFR Newsletter

Call for Applications -- 18th Annual RAND Summer Institute
Demography, Economics, and Epidemiology of Aging
Date Due: March 11
Link to RAND

Texas Council on Family Relations (TCFR) Annual Conference
Promoting Healthy Families: Sexuality Across the Lifespan
Date: March 31-April 1
Preconference on Domestic Violence
Date: March 30
Link to TCFR

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HM Links & Clips (12/22/10) #157

10) YouTube - NHMRC Roundtable - Why are healthy marriage and ...
Representatives from healthy marriage and family programs throughout the country met in a series of roundtable discussions over the summer of 2010.

9) Marriage: An institution in danger
Florida Times-Union
Marriage is becoming the "private playground of those already blessed with abundance," the report said. For the wealthy, marriage is just as healthy as it ...

8) The 24/7 Dad: Leaving a legacy
News-Press Now
According to the National Fatherhood Initiative, children who live absent from their biological fathers are, on average, at least two to three times more ...

And Marriage tames men and in turn helps society: study
By leeda
A report from the Institute of Marriage and Family Canada speculates on why boys and men in the modern world are lagging behind girls. Using a thesis put forth by scholars such as George Gilder, Margaret Mead, David Popenoe, and David ...

And

"Fatherhood Research" by gbeaudry [WorldCat.org]
A limited population of unmarried adolescent fathers: a preliminary report of their views on fatherhood and the relationship with the mothers of their ...
www.worldcat.org/profiles/gbeaudry/lists/2189120

And Community Based Fatherhood Development Programs Overnight Position
Targeting for Healthy Marriage and Responsible Fatherhood Ronald B. Mincy and Marah Curtis Columbia University and Chien-Chung Huang Rutgers University ...
www.docstoc.com/.../Community-Based-Fatherhood-Develop...

7) Download Structure of Family of Origin Chart (.jpg):

6) Only the beginning… | 12/20/2010

Long-time D.C. welfare recipients prepare for life off the rolls

5) http://www.psychotherapynetworker.org/magazine/currentissue/1154-family-matters

4) Reaching adulthood used to mean getting married and having children; today it means either completing school, living independently and/or having a full-time job – but that’s not so easy these days. The trend has resulted in more young adults than ever before who are still living with their parents. Read A Profile of Disconnected Young Adults in 2010. and http://www.alabamamarriage.org/2010summit/index.php

3) Family Structure, Family Stability and Early Child Wellbeing. Terry-Ann Craigie, Jeanne Brooks-Gunn, Jane Waldfogel.

2) http://pewsocialtrends.org/couplesquiz/ and http://www.projecthappilyeverafter.com/the-book/

What Do Men Want? - Dennis Prager - National Review Online

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

ACF/HHS

370 L’Enfant Promenade, SW Washington, DC 20447

(202)260-1550(o);

Bill.Coffin@acf.hhs.gov

…We, Government Leaders, invite colleagues and citizens from every political party to engage in renewed

efforts to pursue laws and public policies that promote the well-being of marriages and families…(Excerpt from http://www.hamptonu.edu/ncaamp/proclamation/)

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage/doc/ACF_Curriculum_Assessment_Guide.doc

http://learning.hhs.gov/elearning/cop.asp

Why Marriage Matters, 26 Conclusions from the Social Sciences

#1 Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers and mothers have good relationships with their children.

#26 A child who is not living with his or her own two married parents is at greater risk for child abuse.

http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=7

For previous editions of HM Links & Clips see http://billcoffin.org

From: Be There for Your Kids! [maggie@the-bawmann-group.ccsend.com] on behalf of Be There for Your Kids! [info@coloradodads.com]
Sent: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 7:01 PM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]Be There for Your Kids Newsletter - December 2010

Having trouble viewing this email? Click here

In This Issue:

Highlights of the Be There for Your Kids Campaign in 2010
Fatherhood and Child Support Partnerships
Program Spotlight
Touch By An Angel and the Men's Warehouse Give Away Free Suits to Dads
Promoting Responsible Fatherhood in Your Community
December Featured Father
Helping Fathers Share the True Meaning of the Holiday Season with their Children
Subscribe to the Latest Be There for Your Kids Public Awareness Campaign Initiatives
Upcoming Events

Highlights of the Be There for Your Kids Campaign in 2010

2010 has been another tremendous year for our public awareness campaign. Did you know that:

We participated in numerous community events during June 2010 to raise awareness of responsible fatherhood and Father's Day? Our work started with a booth at National Get Outdoors Day at City Park in Denver on June 12th and ended at the Colorado Springs Sky Sox game in Colorado Springs on Father's Day. In between, the campaign hosted the premiere screening of "The Evolution of Dad" in Denver; participated in two fatherhood television call-ins that generated more than 140 calls from interested viewers; and partnered with the Colorado Rockies to recognize the winners of the 2010 Be There for Your Kids Awards prior to the June 16th game at Coors Field. Efforts to promote responsible fatherhood in our state resulted in 37 news stories running statewide in June.
More than 100 fatherhood and family service practitioners joined us for the 2010 Fatherhood Training Academy Going from Good to Great? Those who attended the Training Academy from October 4 6 participated in sessions focused on healthy relationships and fatherhood; funding sustainability; working with fathers who have substance abuse problems; understanding Child Welfare and the new Child Welfare portal; working with the Child Support Enforcement Program; domestic violence training; building cultural competency; and public awareness and fatherhood. Training Academy attendees were also treated to keynote presentations from well-known fatherhood educators Mark Kiselica, Ph.D., and Rich Batten, both of whom discussed the value of making personal connections with fathers and the work being done throughout the state to encourage responsible fatherhood.
We developed several in-reach opportunities for Child Support and Child Welfare agencies to increase father engagement? In 2010, the campaign partnered with the Colorado Division of Child Welfare to host five father engagement trainings for caseworkers around the state. More than 200 caseworkers participated in these trainings where they heard from fathers who faced and eventually overcame challenges in navigating the child welfare system thanks to the assistance of fatherhood programs and were trained by Child Welfare and Responsible Fatherhood practitioners on father engagement strategies. Together with the Division of Child Welfare, we also launched a password protected web portal in May. This portal features a wealth of resources to improve father engagement among Child Welfare caseworkers including articles focused on involving fathers in Child Welfare cases, a father-friendly agency check up survey, referral links to local fatherhood programs and the option to subscribe to the monthly Be There for Your Kids e-newsletter.
Our partnership with the Child Support Enforcement (CSE) Program has also grown to include the launch of a Child Support specific portal, an informational video explaining the components of Child Support for fathers and tip sheets for dads to use when working with their CSE technicians. The tip sheets can be downloaded from this page of the Colorado Dads website.
The campaign hosted a special fatherhood recognition event with Elvis Dumervil of the Denver Broncos? On October 17th, seven fathers and their children received free tickets to the Broncos vs. Jets game from Elvis. They arrived at Invesco Field via a party bus and were then taken on the field to meet some of the players and enjoy the game. Then on Friday, November 12th, Elvis joined the selected dads and kids for pizza and an autograph session.
The director of the U.S. Administration for Children and Families, Dr. Earl Johnson, participated in a site visit at the Jefferson County Child Support Fatherhood program on November 17th? There, he learned of the numerous collaborations taking place between fatherhood programs, state agencies and non-profit organizations around the state.
We distributed thousands of dollars worth of free giveaways to Colorado fathers and their children? These items ranged from free tickets to Denver Nuggets, Colorado Avalanche and Colorado College hockey games to free trail rides in the San Juan Forest and free admission to the Denver Children's Museum. Each month, the Be There for Your Kids campaign strives to distribute several free or low-cost giveaways to Colorado dads so that they can spend more time with their children.
In 2010, the Colorado Dads website received more than 1.6 million hits, 500,000 page views and 115,000 unique visitors? With versions in both English and Spanish, the site is a comprehensive resource for fathers, families and practitioners around the world.

We look forward to continued success in 2011 as we raise awareness of the availability of fatherhood programs in Colorado and build stronger relationships between fathers and their children. Thanks for your support!

Fatherhood and Child Support Partnerships

As mentioned above, the Colorado Promoting Responsible Fatherhood (PRF) Initiative is actively working with the CSE Program to make fatherhood a strong component of the CSE culture. This began with trainings led by Terry Spindler, grants manager for CSE, for fatherhood practitioners and Child Support technicians earlier this year. Now, we are set to formally launch the Child Support Fatherhood Incentive portal and an updated version of the CSE and fatherhood informational video that was first distributed at the 2010 Fatherhood Training Academy. Stay tuned for more great inroads with CSE in the coming year!

Program Spotlight Prowers County Fatherhood Program Lamar

1. What services do you provide to fathers and families with your community access grant funding?

The Prowers County Fatherhood Program offers fatherhood training classes to all dads in Prowers County free of charge. The classes are designed to strengthen a father's relationship with his children as well as gain knowledge and support needed to address barriers and achieve effective parenting through positive communication.

We offer two 13-week training courses. The Caring Dads and Nurturing Fathers curricula help us to:

Assist dads in identifying and overcoming barriers.
Focus on the father as a problem solver, role model and nurturer.
Focus on the father as a provider, co-parent and community member.
Walk dads through various stages and challenges of being a good father to their children.
Provide support and guidance with our county Child Support and Child Welfare offices.

2. What do you ultimately want to achieve with your program?

We hope to change the culture of fathering in our community through child centered parenting, which will have a lasting impact on entire families. We encourage dads to make positive behavioral changes for their children. We believe that through these efforts our community will have a better understanding of fatherhood and the importance of fathers in building a healthy family environment.

3. Describe at typical day at Prowers County Fatherhood Program.

A typical day at the office includes facilitating classes, individual meetings and assessments as well as helping to instill hope in fathers that they can be great dads for their children.

4. What is the best part about working with fathers and families?

The best part is seeing a father transform from his initial intake to the end of our program when he's become a better parent for his children. Some of the barriers these men have to overcome can seem insurmountable. It's like seeing a miracle happen and I'm humbled to have a part in it.

5. Share a program/father success story with us.

We had a young father who was separated from his spouse and turned to substance abuse. This cost him many things, including his children. With the help of the local domestic violence provider and our Caring Dads program, this father was able to gain support to that helped him through his addiction.

Through his substance abuse treatment, this father has been sober for three months, was able to remove himself from unhealthy relationships and is currently repairing the relationship he has with his children. He is determined to overcome his barriers and learn and grow as a father. He wants to be the dad for his kids that he never had.

On Sunday, November 21st, community access funded program Touch By an Angel partnered with Emmanuel Christian Center and the Men's Warehouse to host a "Men's Suit Giveaway". Several hundred men from east Denver attended the event where they received suits, ties and shirts. Men and families from all walks of life, including halfway houses, were grateful to receive these clothing items. According to one man who attended the giveaway, "These suits are what I need to get a job!". Touch By An Angel looks forward to hosting another suit giveaway in 2011.

Promoting Responsible Fatherhood in Your Community

The Be There for Your Kids campaign encourages you to join our efforts in promoting responsible fatherhood throughout Colorado in 2011! There are many ways you can get involved:

Subscribe to The Face of Fatherhood in Colorado monthly e-newsletter and visit the Colorado Dads website on a regular basis for the latest campaign updates.
Familiarize yourself with the fatherhood programs located in your community. Volunteer to serve as a mentor to fathers participating in a fatherhood program. Or, distribute Be There for Your Kids promotional materials at different community organizations. To obtain any Be There for Your Kids materials, please e-mail Maggie Spain.
Encourage organizations in your community to become more father-friendly. Contact a local school to set up a volunteer program for fathers. The WATCH DOGS (Dads of Great Students) is a great program for fathers to consider. If you live near a military base, research what kinds of programs are available for fathers who are deployed to help them remain connected with their kids. Talk with your employer about what family-life guidelines are in place for fathers, including paternity leave.
Host a fatherhood community event in celebration of Father's Day 2011. Make sure you set-up fun activities for kids of all ages to enjoy spending time with their dads. Partner with a local fatherhood program or community organization to host the event.
Lead by example. Spend time with your children, letting them know that nothing is more important than the relationship you are building. After all, a childhood only lasts 6,570 days!

Thank you for helping fathers make the commitment to be there for their kids!

December Featured Father Lance Wilson

Aurora resident and father of nine (!) Lance Wilson is the most recent father featured on the Colorado Dads website. Lance enjoys playing games with his children as well as helping each child find his or her own talents.

What would you consider to be your most inspiring moment as a dad?

Hearing my stepson say how he saved money to buy his mom a birthday gift with his own money, because he wanted to follow my example of planning ahead.

What would you hope that your kids would say about you if asked what kind of a dad they have?

I hope they would say that they have a fun dad who teaches them how to fix things on their own.

Helping Fathers Share the True Meaning of the Holiday Season with their Children

Commercialism is at an all time high and this holiday season producers and distributors of toys and sugary foods will be fighting for children's attention online, in print and on television. Indeed, estimates indicate that $15 billion will be spent on advertising towards children in 2010. But what kids really want this holiday season, even more than expensive advertised gifts, is to spend quality time with their dads. According to a New American Dream poll, 57 percent of kids would rather do something fun with their mom or dad than go shopping. This December, Colorado dads are encouraged to avoid the rush to the mall and instead spend time with their children teaching them the true meaning of the holiday season.

"The most important gift you can give your children this holiday season is the gift of your time," said Dan Welch, fatherhood and family specialist with the Colorado Department of Human Services. "Children will remember the memories you create together much longer than any expensive gift will last."

There are many free or low-cost activities that fathers can participate in with their children this season to make time together exciting and meaningful. With a little bit of planning, fathers can build stronger relationships and help their children understand the true meaning of the holidays.

Subscribe to the Latest Be There for Your Kids Public Awareness Campaign Initiatives

Our public awareness campaign strives to get the message of responsible fatherhood out to local communities in a variety of ways.

The Fastbreak for Fathers blog, written by fatherhood and family specialist Dan Welch, is updated on a regular basis. Recent topics include "A Time of Wonderment", "A Safe Harbor" and "Earning Respect". Become a subscriber of the blog and you will receive automatic e-mail announcements when it is updated.

fastbreak blog

Check out the Be There for Your Kids Facebook page for all things related to fatherhood. We encourage you to "Like" this page and comment on fatherhood news articles and notes as we increase our number of followers. Be sure to also check out our YouTube channel for the latest campaign videos.

AAAA

HM Links & Clips (12/21/10) #156

10) Social Indicators of Marital Health and Wellbeing:

Marriage

Divorce

Unmarried Cohabitation

Loss of Child Centeredness

Fragile Families with Children

Teen Attitudes about Marriage and Family

9) WETZSTEIN: Golden cloth reunites couple This time of year, people may e-mail each other a story about a "golden" tablecloth from the World War II years.

And Books of The Times: A Marriage That Defied Separation and War

8) Social Media Leads to Divorce? BS
Mediapost.com
In the latest iteration, chronic worriers and their friends in the news media are warning that social media is leading to divorce. Except, it isn't. ...

7) Strengthening Relationships and Supporting Healthy Marriage Among ...
Strengthening Relationships and Supporting Healthy Marriage Among Unwed Parents. Printer-friendly. By Barbara Devaney, M. Robin Dion April 2003 ...

6) More men are unmarried than women in Ohio
Lancaster Eagle Gazette
Now school and work come first, then marriage and kids, said Anastasia Snyder, professor of human development and family science at Ohio State University. ...

5) 5 Marriage Blogs That Rock | The Toolbox at LisaKiftTherapy.com
Marriage Counseling If you think marriage counseling is only for couples who... 5 Tips for a Healthy and Happy Marriage A happy and healthy marriage is one ...

And Government blogs about international relations, immigration, armed forces, veterans, and military families. http://www.usa.gov/Topics/Reference_Shelf/News/Blog/defense.shtml

And http://familyscholars.org/2010/12/20/were-we-brave-enough-to-hold-hands-and-jump/

4) Marriage: Marginalized in the Middle - Christianity Today magazine ...
We should aggressively pursue improved marriage education programs. Robert Rector, an authority on poverty and welfare at The Heritage Foundation, ...

And http://blog.marshillchurch.org/2010/12/14/how-to-honor-your-wife/

And Growing up: marriage is a great motivator

2010-12-20 16:01:40-05

For most people large, tight families who do just about everything en masse is the stuff of legend, or reality TV shows. But as the oldest of ten children I live with it every day. This article, for example, was interrupted to rescue a precious stuffed bunny from the new puppy, and mediate who got to wear the princess dress. Read more...

3) http://www.aspe.hhs.gov/_/topic/subtopic.cfm?subtopic=377

2) 5 Mistakes Couples Make During Fights – #2 | Flourishing Families

1) List it. Are you passionate about something? Click "Create a List" to make a top ten list about anything you like so you can share it with the community. If your top ten list is popular enough, it may end up on the homepage as a top ten top ten list! http://www.toptentopten.com

Bill Coffin

Special Assistant for Marriage Education

ACF/HHS

370 L’Enfant Promenade, SW Washington, DC 20447

(202)260-1550(o);

Bill.Coffin@acf.hhs.gov

…We, Government Leaders, invite colleagues and citizens from every political party to engage in renewed

efforts to pursue laws and public policies that promote the well-being of marriages and families…(Excerpt from http://www.hamptonu.edu/ncaamp/proclamation/)

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/healthymarriage/doc/ACF_Curriculum_Assessment_Guide.doc

http://learning.hhs.gov/elearning/cop.asp

Why Marriage Matters, 26 Conclusions from the Social Sciences

#1 Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers and mothers have good relationships with their children.

#26 A child who is not living with his or her own two married parents is at greater risk for child abuse.

http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=7

For a previous edition of HM Links & Clips see Comments (0) - HM Links & Clips (12/17/10) #154 - Coffin Corner
A statewide clearinghouse of Relationship and Marriage Education classes is available ... Core Marriage Education Workshops You will attend a series of 10 ...
billcoffin.org/hm-links-clips-121710-154

From: Ozarks Marriage Matters [phyllis@forest.ccsend.com] on behalf of Ozarks Marriage Matters [newsletter@ozarksmarriagematters.org]
Sent: Tuesday, December 21, 2010 5:32 AM
To: Coffin, Bill (ACF)
Subject: [MARKETING EMAIL]OMM News & Notes - December 21, 2010

In This Issue:

Sit Back, Relax, and Take a Minute ...
Merry Christmas from the Operation Us Staff
One Hour Host Training for Individuals or Couples January 5, 2011
Getaway Together Marriage Retreat - January 14-15, 2011
Keep an Eye Out for Our New Billboard Series
Ask Your Relationship Questions

OMM News & Notes: Promoting Healthy Relationships December 21, 2010

Sit Back, Relax and Take a Minute . . .

by Dr. Jennifer Baker

http://www.youtube.com/operationus#p/a/u/1/PWMNO1myEzU

Click To Read The Rest

-->

Merry Christmas from the Operation Us Staff

One Hour Host Training Scheduled January 5, 2011

for Individuals or Couples

To Learn More from Other Hosts Click Here

Call our office for information - (417) 823-3469.

To Hear Couples Talking about a Previous Retreat and to Register Click Here

Dog Getting More Attention?

Keep an eye out for our new billboard series!

Have Questions About Relationships?

Check out our new Ask A Question web page where you can send Dr. Baker a question that she just might answer the next time she's on the air with Andy Taylor. -->

And don't forget to visit our podcast archive, where you can listen to earlier appearances.

Support OMM - Find out How to Get Involved!

http://www.ozarksmarriagematters.org/getinvolved.html

Subscribe to News & Notes

No need to forward, just click on the link to subscribe to the weekly e-newsletter.

http://www.ozarksmarriagematters.org/connect.html

AAAA

9) On Forgiveness (NYT)

By CHARLES L. GRISWOLD In order to forgive others, victims must put aside revenge. But what are the other conditions of true forgiveness?

1. And one for your parents A Tribute: The Best Gift You Can Give Your Parents - FamilyLife.com

9) Pinky Swears are Worthless and Other Lessons Divorce Teaches Our Children Well

And A Grandmother Struggles With Divorce

In This Issue:

Highlights of the Be There for Your Kids Campaign in 2010

Fatherhood and Child Support Partnerships

Program Spotlight  Prowers County Fatherhood Program  Lamar

Touch By An Angel and the Men's Warehouse Give Away Free Suits to Dads

Promoting Responsible Fatherhood in Your Community

December Featured Father  Lance Wilson

Helping Fathers Share the True Meaning of the Holiday Season with their Children

Subscribe to the Latest Be There for Your Kids Public Awareness Campaign Initiatives

9) WETZSTEIN: Golden cloth reunites couple This time of year, people may e-mail each other a story about a "golden" tablecloth from the World War II years.

Program Spotlight Prowers County Fatherhood Program Lamar

December Featured Father Lance Wilson